On the Radio: Sammy Hagar goes "Over the Top"

I know, I know, when does Sammy Hagar ever NOT go over the top, right? But today I refer to "Winner Takes It All," his classic theme song to the Sly Stallone movie "Over the Top." I got way too excited when I heard this the other day in, of all places, a grocery store.

You see, one of the best places to rediscover cheesy eighties rock songs is in your local supermarket. I find that Muzak is a thing of the past in most of these places. Now that the 1980s are, you know, old and stuff, pretty much anything from the decade counts as soft rock, or at least rock inoffensive enough to not disturb shoppers while they're picking a jar of marinara sauce.

I think I was in the soup aisle when I realized what was playing. It was all I could do to keep from singing along, especially since I was shopping alone and would only embarrass myself (unless you count all of humanity).

You may remember that "Over the Top" is perhaps THE definitive arm wrestling movie, and, boy, does Hagar capture the grandeur, the intensity, and the sheer adrenaline of the sport. As I strutted towards the front, I was so pumped I didn't even feel my customary annoyance at the lack of manned checkout lines. I did, however, feel like going down to the express line and challenging the cashier to a quick arm wrestling bout to let me go through there. But that wasn't about my dislike of self-checkout; it was just the spirit of Hagar running through my veins (and since his spirit is usually about 20% tequila, I probably shouldn't have driven home right away, now that I think about it).

Oh, yeah, I was on an emotional high, but I had no outlet for my sudden competitive urge. As Groucho Marx said in "The Cocoanuts," "I'll wrestle anybody in the crowd for $5.00." I don't know if that directly relates to this story, but it's hilarious when he says it, and I want to quote him.

I made it out of the store with my groceries, my self-respect, and my right arm, but even now, several days later, I'm still a little amped. I apologize for not having a slam-bang finish to this post, one that involves a championship, an inspirational comeback, and maybe a Kenny Loggins tune over the end credits, but I'm going to make it up to you by sharing the lyrics to the chorus of "Winner Takes It All" so you can get some of the vibe for yourself.

You may not be one of the dozens of Americans in a professional or recreational arm wrestling league, but if you need to, I don't know, hoist a car or something today, this song could get the juices going.

(Reprinted without permission but with confidence that Sammy Hagar is a pretty cool guy and wouldn't mind sharing)

Winner takes it all
Loser takes a fall
Fight to the beginning of the end
Winner takes it all
Till he breaks the fall
In time he'll make it over the top