Thursday, March 3, 2016

Two recent songs really grind my gears

1) "Honey I'm Good" by Andy Grammer: This guy is SOOOO nice and SUUUUCH a good man that he promises not just to stay true, but to stay true-ooh-ooh-ooh-OOH-ooh-ooh. He says, "Honey, I'm good," meaning he's done drinking. If he shas another, he might not leave alone, and he's got someone at home. But he's NOT gonna have another.

Well, good for you, pal. here's my question, Mr. Nice Guy: What the hell are you doing drinking with some strange woman while your sweetheart is at home? If you were really committed to her, you wouldn't be in this spot in the first place!

If I am misreading this song and it is actually an ironic declaration from a man who fully intends to cheat on his significant other, than I apologize. That's the only way the scenario makes sense.

2) "One Call Away" by Charlie Puth: This has the look of another wolf in sheep's clothing. The guy sounds all sensitive, telling someone he's just one call away from saving the day. He wants to be your friend. He wants love. What could be wrong with that?

Well, why does he drag Superman into it? Puth repeatedly declares, "Superman's got nothing on me." Uh. I'm calling BS on this. Denzel Washington was able to proclaim, King Kong  ain;t got nothing on me," in "Training Day," but that was Denzel, not some "sensitive" singer type.

And since when does being one call away best the Man of Steel? You don't even have to call HIM. He just shows up and saves you! Sure, Jimmy Olsen has that signal watch, but we all know Superman only gave him that to get him off his back every now and then. Most of the rest of the world doesn't have to call, text, or email Superman. It just has to get in trouble, and guess who shows up? Not Charlie Puth. Superman.

I'm not comfortable with a world in which guys can get away with bragging about being better than Superman. First they conceive a movie that puts Batman on equal (if not greater) footing with the Kryptonian, and now this. I wouldn't blame Supes if he abandoned us all for some planet where he doesn't have to sit through cloying songs from men who think they're better than everyone else.

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