WHY? (Special all-TV edition)

It's Friday, and I got a whole bunch of gripes--gripes that raise questions. So let me just get them off my chest and wonder...WHY?

*The previously pretty-darn-good "Modern Family" featured a terrible storyline this week that doubled as a big advertisement for Costco.
WHY?

*People eat Chipotle despite getting blood-stained underwear.
WHY?
(note: this item is in tribute to "South Park," which offered a much, much better example of "product placement" this week than did "Modern Family.")

*Comedy Central is promoting a new Nick Swardson comedy special titled..."Seriously, Who Farted?"
WHY?

*In a promo for last night's Jay Leno Show," NBC acted like it was a real "How cool is this?" moment when Jack Black and Ben Harper jammed together.
WHY?

*The organizers of the new United Football League (airing on Versus and HDNet) decided it would be a good idea to run games in the fall...at the same time as the NFL.
WHY?

*NBC renewed "Southland" almost immediately last season, then canceled it this week before its second season even aired.
WHY?

*'Playboy" to put Marge Simpson on its cover next month to appeal to younger readers.
WHY?
(didn't they ever consider, I don't know, getting a really hot celebrity younger readers want to see naked to pose for them?)

*There is a new reality show about the family of Lorenzo Lamas.
WHY?

*The owners of Fine Living Network are going to shut it down and relaunch it as Cooking Channel...even though they already own Food Network.
WHY?

*NBC decided to launch promising new sitcom "Community" by running it for a few weeks at 9:30, then suddenly moving it to 8:00.
WHY?