5Q Movie Review: Justice League: Crisis on Two Earths

Q: Ooh, the word "Crisis" means this is full of Earth 2, the Justice Society of America, Monitors, and serves as an adaptation of the comic series "Crisis on Infinite Earths," "Identity Crisis," and/or "Infinite Crisis," right?
A: Uh, no. It does offer parallel worlds, a key concept in the DC Comics universe which is prominent in many of its biggest events. But this direct-to-video animated feature focuses on a set of villains called the Crime Syndicate, composed of alternate versions of the flagship DC superheroes. So don't be disappointed that this story doesn't adapt those other stories or feature the JSA. Or be disappointed (like I was), but just don't be surprised.

Q: If I didn't understand a word of that first question except "right," am I going to be totally lost watching this?
A: No, or at least not any more so than the rest of us. There are a good number of plot holes and ideas and elements that are wild even by comic book standards, but the screenplay explains enough so that you can follow along without problem as long as you don't have a Crisis of Disbelief. And this is in many ways a "Justice League" cartoon, though not nearly as good as the excellent, much missed TV series. Supes, Bats, Flash, Wonder Woman, Green Lantern, Martian Manhunter, and a roster of guest stars fight bad guys. What more do you need to know?

Q: How does this stack up to recent DC Animated features?
A: As I said, the story strains credibility, but not as much as the recent "Superman/Batman Public Enemies." This one also offers some great fight scenes, though not quite as many, and many are quite well designed, though Green Lantern looks like a chump when his ring-wielding counterpart conceives different shapes but GL keeps making big green fists to punch stuff. Speaking of GL, "Crisis" is also an improvement of "First Flight," but not up to the level of "Wonder Woman" or "New Frontier." In short, comic book fans and Justice League fans should enjoy this if they can get past the casting.

Q: Does the voice casting work?
A: Most of it is fine, but, oh, how some of it makes you wish they just used the usual suspects from the TV show. Woods is great, and Gina Torres does good work, too, as his partner (and I DO mean partner--RROWR!). Chris Noth is effective as a different kind of Lex Luthor. But the JLA is only as good as its big guns, and Mark Harmon is all wrong as Superman.

Even more distracting and off-putting, though--and that's saying something--is William Baldwin as Batman. Calling yourself "William" does not in and of itself confer screen presence. No matter what kind of solutions Batman comes up with against the villains, no matter how ingenious his tactics, as soon as I hear that voice, this Caped Crusader's IQ seems to plummet.

Q: The DVD is loaded with extras, right? Are they worthwhile?
A: Well, I hear there's a cool animated short featuring the Spectre, a documentary, some "Justice League" episodes, and a few live-action superhero pilots. I hear 'em, but I don't see 'em, because Netflix isn't offering the bonus disc despite bowing down to almighty Warner Brothers and agreeing to delay renting this movie for a month. And you know my motto: If I can't rent it, I ain't buyin' it, neither. Maybe I should add a "nohow" in there somewhere, but you get my drift.