Fun with TV Listings

Sometimes reading the on-screen programming guide is more than just a way to get info; it can also be a source of entertainment. Well, at least it can for simpleminded folk like myself.

Each weekday, my listings, not having specific episode info, describe "Quincy" with this generic series summary:

A tenacious Los Angeles County medical examiner uses his extensive medical training and superior deductive reasoning to solve mysteries and prove that a foul deed is the real reason an unfortunate person ended up on his examine table.

A foul deed? A foul deed? How...I don't know, Victorian-sounding. I can just picture a wide-eyed Jack Klugman tilting his head, putting his hands up, and saying, "A foul DEED?" You know, and then he'd get that blank "I don't know what to make of this" look he often gives right after the incredulous look.

Then there's this description of The Greatest Cable Channel Known to Mankind's screening of "The Babe Ruth Story" later today:

"A misunderstood oaf becomes one of the greatest men to ever play professional baseball."

OK, so the Babe was a bit oafish, but should that be the lead when you're talking about the Bambino? Even considering William Bendix plays him in the movie, "oaf" is a little negative. Maybe "lug" would be appropriate. All I know is I read that description and busted out laughing because it sounded like some guy walked out of the forest with a giant club he gnawed out of an oak tree, lumbered over to a baseball diamond, and started hacking away at random pitches while onlookers debated whether to just admire his power or call the police.

Or maybe I'm reading too much into it. But, hey, I like those TV listings sometimes.