Saturday, May 13, 2017

Streaming Video Power Rankings: Week #59: Special "Dedicated to my mother" edition

As we approach Mother's Day, let us think of the many ways in which we can honor our beloved maternal figures. How about letting them waste a whole day watching streaming video? If these power rankings can guide you as you determine how to spend the holiday...well, I'm a little scared, frankly. But here we go,

1) Hulu: Yeah, the fix is on. I didn't watch as much Hulu as I intended, but I AM paying full price this month, remember, so Hulu is my new streaming BFF. I did make an effort to remind myself that, hey, Seinfeld is on here. Remember when I got so excited that the whole series was debuting on Hulu? I have seen about 8 episodes. But one of them was this week!

2) Warner Archive Instant: Still no fix for the Roku channel, but they did put together a nice showcase collection for Mother's Day, and they are now touting the complete run of Medical Center. That's a lot of Medical Center and not nearly as exciting as Eight Is Enough, but it's something. Meanwhile, Adrienne Barbeau's guest turn as an older woman romancing David Bradford on EIE is enough to merit a high spot for WAI.

3) Netflix: Actually, there's a lot going on this week here with the Netflix originals--Norm McDonald, a new Jeff Garlin movie, Aziz Ansari's show returning...I am intrigued by this new King Julian series. The Netflix kid set shows are so far under the radar, they are already spawning spinoffs, yet no one seems to talk about them.

I watched a bit more of 10 Reasons Why and could easily boost Netflix a slot or two, but, eh, it's big enough to survive being "only" 3. Besides, what has Netflix done for my mother lately?

4) YouTube: Thank you, YouTube, for allowing me to do more podcast preparation with your vast reserves. No, I'm not gonna tell you what I watched and risk having you take it down.

5) MLB.TV:  I don't want to say the Pirates are bad, but--actually, no, that's exactly what I want to say. They have been hit by injuries (and, oh, yeah, cough, cough, PED suspensions and idiot players racking up DUIs), but they are just not playing well. At least I got to watch live as history was almost made when they nearly got no-hit the other night.

6) Shout! Factory TV: It took them a while, but they did upload some more stuff for May--more entries in the VHS Vault category, including John Stamos and Vanity (with Gene Simmons) in Never Too Young to Die. Hmm, I may have rated them too low this week.

7) Amazon Prime: In addition to Kevin Bacon in I Love Dick,  a series from the creator of Transparent that seems destined for Golden Globes love, there is a Tom Hanks movie called  A Hologram for the King. Are we already at that point in Tom Hanks' career in which we don't hear anything about his films until they show up on home video?

8) Pub-D-Hub: Presented without comment: The Gay Dog (1954), available for one week only. Admit that you're curious. I'm still disappointed in Pub-D-Hub, though, for an update without any new TV episodes--a rarity but a letdown when it occurs.

9) The CW: This may be the end of the line for The CW, which is great because it's free but disappointing because of the massive and irritating commercial load and the fact that some of the shows I'm watching here are creatively disappointing me lately. And I don't mean they are disappointing me in creative ways, but that--you probably get the idea.

10) Nosey: Did anyone ask for a free SVOD service with archival episodes of Jerry Springer, Sally, and Maury? Well, if you're the guy, here you are. There are also original Match Game and Family Feud episodes. It's like your one-stop shopping destination for low-rent daytime TV...but the price is right (uh, not The Price Is Right; that ain't on here). And, yes, it is actually called "Nosey."

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