5 Streaming Video on Demand Offerings I'd Like to See in 2016 #3: NFL Films

We all know one of the most powerful/evil entities on the planet is the National Football League. We also know that if  there's one thing the league loves, it's  making money (If it can stick it to a metropolitan region while doing so, all the better). Why, then, does the NFL seem uninterested in monetizing its cast library?

Last year, the NFL trotted out a half-assed Roku channel called NFL Now. It offered (very) limited free clips, and for a small fee per month, subscribers had access to SOME of the NFL Network programming like the "America's Game" and "A Football Life" documentaries. I don't think anyone even promoted it, and it died. I would say it predictably died, but it's always a surprise when the NFL fails at making money on something. Plus I made a New Year's resolution to cut down on adverbs.

This season, NFL Channel relaunched with an emphasis on access to condensed in-season games, the same short mobile-friendly clips tailored by team interest, and no original programming. I don't know how well it's doing, but it looks like an even more half-assed effort than last year's version, and I don't get the strategy.

Here's what I don't want to see on an NFL Roku channel: in-season games. Well, actually, I'd love that access, but the league has a service called NFL GameRewind that offers coaches film and everything, and it is supposed to be great, but I don't want to pay for that.

I would "settle" for a simple NFL channel that offers, at a minimum:

1) All current NFL Network original shows within 30 days of premiering on the network
2) All NFL Network original shows that have aired
3) Extensive material from the NFL Films library: NFL Films Presents, Football Follies, NFL's Greatest Games, etc.

I mean, we all love the work NFL Films does, right? Let's see all the archival stuff with John Facenda's narration. I want to see the Raiders and Steelers of the 1970s. I want to see Montana. I want to see Namath. Right now, some of it turns up occasionally on the Network or on ESPN, and there are some DVD collections, but there is a ton of content not available anywhere.

Now let's get ambitious. Let's get not just the NFL Films specials and documentaries, but old episodes of "This Week in Pro Football" with Tom Brookshier and Pat Summerall. That should be owned by the NFL. It might be a pipe dream to get old "ESPN NFL Primetime" episodes, but I'd love to see what for years was THE source for highlights.

And what I would really, really love to see: actual complete game broadcasts. Does the league have retransmission rights for these after all these years? I don't know, but I'll bet it does, and besides, what, is CBS going to complain that the NFL shows a 1982 Vikings/Bears game? Give them a piece of the pie. Make all of it available on demand, or at least launch with a bunch, then add games each week. How much fun would it be to see the old pregame shows, too? And throw up old "Monday Night Football" telecasts with Cosell, Meredith, and Gifford each Monday in the offseason.

Would you pay 5 bucks a month for this? I sure would, especially with any kind of presence of old (and I mean pre-2000s) *complete* games in original broadcast form. I'd even be willing to consider just a package centered around NFL Films programs and documentaries if it were affordable  and not limited in terms of selection.

Unfortunately, the fiasco that occurred last week when the NFL trumpeted a screening of Super Bowl I may indicate how the NFL feels about offering its archival material at an affordable price. It lowballed the owner of an actual videotape of the game, then put together something based on footage from other sources and ruined it by having people talk over it the whole time. 

I'm not optimistic about something like my vision becoming reality, but a guy can dream. I'm surprised the league isn't at least trying something with that goldmine of archival content.

5Q Movie Review: Draft Day (2014)

Q: This movie features the cooperation of the NFL in the form of real team names and logos, appearances by NFL Network personalities, and even a role for Commissioner Roger Goodell as himself. Is this an authentic look at the annual NFL player draft?
A: No! The entire scenario that unfolds in "Draft Day," involving multiple last-minute trades of high draft picks, Costner's general manager making rash decisions without involving anyone in his organization, etc., is laughable. The story strains credibility at the beginning, then becomes increasingly ludicrous.

Q: Do you have to be a football fan to enjoy "Draft Day"?
A: It's hard for me to judge how a non-fan would react to it, but I think it helps to know how the NFL Draft really works, not because it enhances your appreciation of the movie, but because it lets you enjoy how bad it is. A mediocre film becomes a true howler.

The story centers on the pursuit of a franchise QB named Bo Callahan. Costner makes a reckless move to get the number one pick so he can get Callahan, THEN decides he needs to research the player. This is on the day of the draft, mind you. Then he changes his mind and starts making more reckless trades, and THEN the movie contorts itself so that the team he originally traded with has to reverse its position for no reason, all so that Costner's GM (who is compared to Joe Montana) can be lauded as some sort of genius. In real life, the guy would be pilloried for not understanding the process, even if he somehow were able to do everything he does in this story.

Q: Is Kevin Costner at least credible as the Cleveland Browns general manager?
A: The stuff he does is ridiculous, but Costner in a sports movie delivers just about every time. It's a good thing because while "Draft Day" half-heartedly tries to weave in threads about his complicated relationship with Jennifer Garner's salary cap guru and with his mother and late father, there isn't much else going on here. The focus is on the machinations of the draft, and there is little compelling about any character in the film, Costner included.

Q: What about the rest of the cast?
A: It seems like a waste to cast Denis Leary as a head coach but not give him a chance to do a lengthy rant--at the team, at Costner, at the guy who does research for the media guide, anybody. He just kinds of bitches about things the whole time until he suddenly does a 180 and embraces Costner's character like he's Ron Wolf.

Jennifer Garner doesn't have much to do, but then again, neither does anyone else. It's kind of nice to see Rosanna Arquette again for a few minutes. I assume someone owed Sean Combs a favor and that's why he has a role as Bo Callhan's agent. I would have rather seen more of Terry Crews, who plays a different agent.

There's a small taste of "Veep" with Kevin Dunn and Timothy Simons, plus Tom Welling in a small role. I have to admit I didn't recognize Welling. Frank Langella and Ellen Burstyn do decent work as (basically) a-holes: the a-hole team owner and Costner's a-hole mother.

There are a lot of other recognizable faces, too, plus a bevy of ESPN and pro football cameos, but none stands out. It's a very Costner-centric movie.

Q: What should Costner's next sports movie be?
A: Even if I don't like the movies, there's something about Costner in a sports flick that's just so easy to watch. I want to say him play a fictionalized version of Vince McMahon in a period piece about 1980s professional wrestling.

How about a story with Costner as a controversial former tennis pro who sees a chance for redemption in training a rising superstar? We don't  get enough tennis movies.

Now maybe Yahoo! gets its act together

"Community" just finished a sixth season of episodes that was artistically successful but not technologically successful. Yahoo! Screen has always been a frustrating experience. It was bad news when the company bought digital rights to the "Saturday Night Live" library because the website's confusing interface and disorganization was sure to make finding anything a frustrating task. Guess what? It was!

I thought when Yahoo! spent some money for an actual TV series and (sort of) promoted it, the website would try to put together a decent online "channel" to showcase it. In turn, the increased traffic from the high-profile acquisition would show off the new Yahoo! Screen, enabling the company to invest more in developing it. But NOOOOOOOO!!!

Instead, Yahoo! continued its half-assed approach to the channel. My naivete continued after the first couple of episodes when I saw scores of complaints about how difficult it was to stream "Community" and I assumed the issues would be fixed. Several months later, the technical issues are still there, the interface is still terrible, and I don't know if Yahoo! has done anything to improve the situation.

I watched the series on the Roku version, with ad-free viewing that came at a price: Anytime I tried to fast-forward or rewind an episode, the channel would crash. Re-launching the channel would not return me to where I was in the episode. In fact, if I watched anytime after the new installment "dropped" on Tuesday, I'd probably not even get the episode, since Yahoo! Screen on Roku auto-launches to whatever it deems most "popular" at a given moment. The sad thing is, this lousy way to view the show was still probably better and more reliable than what most people  got watching directly on the website.

Now Yahoo! has acquired exclusive digital rights to an NFL game--granted, an uninteresting one, but a real regular season game--and I expect this will finally improve things. Sony and Dan Harmon and everyone else involved with "Community" may not have cared enough to put heat on Yahoo! to get its act together, but the NFL doesn't want any part of Amateur Hour. It's possible that Yahoo! bypasses its Screen thing and streams this game on its front page somehow, but I believe the pressure of the National Football League, which controls everything down to the socks its players wear on the field, will make Yahoo! put some effort into making a watchable "tv-like" facsimile available.

I was excited about a possible seventh season of "Community," but not so much if it would be on Yahoo! Now I'm more optimistic, and I hope Yahoo! has a few bucks left over to retain at least some of the cast members and give us another batch of episodes with the Greendale crew.

Ready for the Big Game?

Personally I think the NFL made a big mistake by playing the Super Bowl after the Pro Bowl. How can the nation get back up for football after the spectacle of some of the game's best players, complemented by a slew of good ones replacing the ones that couldn't bother to be there, kind of trying to win?

I endorsed Denver several weeks ago, and I continue to root for Peyton Manning, but if the digits of the score happen to fall a certain way and I happen to win a few books in an office pool, I could tolerate a victory by either side.

I am amazed at the expansion of the halftime filler to include the Kitten Bowl and the Fish Bowl alongside the ever-popular Puppy Bowl. Me, I'm grateful for anything that gives me an excuse not to watch Bruno Mars, but my own plan is to fire up an episode of "Jackpot Bowling" with Milton Berle. In other words, yep, you guessed it, it'll be the Bowl Bowl.

As long as the wings are good, though, it should be an enjoyable evening. Have fun tonight, folks, and don't get any concussions.

Stuff We Should Bring Back: The Statue of Liberty Play

Remember the Statue of Liberty play in football? Oh, we see variations of it sometimes, but the offenses are always trying to be genuinely deceptive about it, running some other kind of simultaneous trickeration to distract everyone from the beauty of the play. Far too often, some generic end around or misdirection is run when a good Statue of Liberty could otherwise be executed.

Here is what I consider the true Statue of Liberty play, the one that we ran playing neighborhood football (and there is no truer form of the sport than neighborhood tackle football, preferably with a Nerf ball): The quarterback drops back to throw--OR DOES HE? In fact, he (or she, though my neighborhood didn't have a lot of Helen Hunt types) backpedals a few steps then suddenly freezes with his arm cocked back as if to throw. Only he does NOT throw. He stands there like a moron so that a running back/wide receiver (there's really no difference in neighborhood football) can dart behind him, snatch the ball out of his hand, and run to daylight!

Any misdirection element of this play is negated by 1) the ridiculous amount of time it takes to pull it off, 2) the goofy stance of the quarterback trying to look normal if the timing isn't perfect (and it never is in neighborhood football), and perhaps most significantly, 3) the inability of the players on the offensive team to resist shouting, "STATUE OF LIBERTY!" as soon as the play happens. The "trick" part of the trick play isn't the critical element. It's the coolness of it. You don't even run the play because it might work; you run it because it's fun. So declaring what you were doing was part of the deal. What's the point in doing such a silly-looking maneuver if everyone isn't aware of it?

Shouldn't the big, fancy pro teams of the NFL, in particular, run more plays just because they're fun? Yes. Yes, they should. There are a lot of players who would get a big thrill out of taking that ball and yelling, "STATUE OF LIBERTY!" as they race to get past the line of scrimmage and maybe bust the edge. Of course, there are a lot of quarterbacks who would hate getting creamed as a direct result of this call, but, well, that's fun, too, isn't it?

Speaking on Sports

I compiled some sports-related "Shark Bytes"-ish comments into a single post. If you aren't into sports, though, feel free to turn right to the page with the horoscopes and the Jumble.

*I don't know why so many of us thought that Fox Sports 1 might provide a decent alternative to ESPN's Sportscenter, but we kind of did. My early thoughts are that the clutter is too much, the highlights are too little. and I can do without the panel segments. I haven't seen much of the personalities yet, but I just don't think there's anyone there besides Charissa Thompson who is compelling enough to keep me from changing the channel. That said, I like the idea of someone making an effort to give the Worldwide Leader some competition.

*I caught a little bit of ESPN2's new "Olbermann" the other night. This show stars former Sportscenter anchor...Larry Biel. No, it's Keith Olbermann, of course, and he is full-on Olbermann for better or worse. I thought what I saw was pretty good, but I was puzzled that he led off with a Johnny Manziel monologue, then had John McEnroe on to talk about Johnn Manziel. I love Johnny Mac, and it was a decent enough chat, but it was in the middle of the U.S. Open. Eventually Keith thanked McEnroe for leaving the tournament early to come to the studio, and I thought, "OK, next segment, they'll talk about tennis." But, nope, that was it! Maybe Tim Tebow will buy a racket and start taking lessons, and then the sport will be important enough to be spotlighted on ESPN's main shows.

*At some point it became acceptable for announcers and sports journalists to talk about "my" team, meaning the teams they root for. That was a terrible point in sports media history. I think hearing some guy talk about "my Patriots" or whoever in the middle of an analysis segment is even worse than hearing him talk about players being on his fantasy team.

*I have long hated the Philadelphia Eagles so much I don't even want to sit through their games long enough to root for their opponent, but with Chip Kelly putting in a fast-paced offense, the team might actually be fun to watch. That's good to know as we get ready for the weekly NFC East Game of the Week on Fox and NBC.

*I don't know if I can ever be more than a casual college football fan again. It's the combination of what happened at Penn State ("my" Penn State, that is) and the idiocy of the NCAA and all the off-field nonsense. Oh, well. I still check out the games when I can.

*Fascinating story by Don Van Natta for ESPN on the possibility of Bobby Riggs throwing the infamous Battle of the Sexes tennis match with Billie Jean King. I feel sorry for King, who has been proud of her victory for years and now has to confront the possibility that Riggs tanked to settle gambling debts. "Outside the Lines" had a good piece on this story. Hey, you know what would have improved it, though? Inviting John McEnroe to come on and give his take...on Johnny Manziel.

*This is a dumb thing to place as the seventh bullet point, but the one thing that annoys me about the advent of football season is how many people are willing to kick baseball to the curb.

*I've been waiting for the cheapskate special on MLB.TV. Last year, membership from September 1 to the end of the season was only $10. This year, the special is in effect now, and it's $20. I don't even think there's any discount there. It might just be a prorated amount based on the regular season price. Point being, it really isn't a cheapskate special at all. MLB, I guess you don't want my money, or at least the small amount of money I was willing to give you after not paying you all season for the regular version of your product. Well, fine, then!

Something weird is going on at ESPN

ESPN, which could credibly be called ESPNFL, used to run a "Football Today" podcast--not nearly often enough to satisfy its loyal listeners (I was one of them), but it was a regular part of the network's web presence even during the offseason.

A few months ago, host Ross Tucker's contract expired, and he left the network and the show. A similar thing happened last year, with Tucker in limbo as negotiations went on, but he then returned. Not so this time, however; in fact, ex-OL Tucker, a sharp guy who takes the sport seriously but keeps it in perspective, while never taking HIMSELF too seriously,  has started the aptly named "Ross Tucker Football Podcast," with a similar tone, similar features, even some of the same sponsors. Furthermore, he's doing his show 3 times a week, in stark contrast to ESPN's former once-a-week offseason schedule.

Of course, Tucker's show (which has already proved to be an excellent source of insight for the serious football fan) stands in even starker contrast to "Football Today's" current ZERO times a week schedule. After Tucker's departure, longtime show guest and co-host Matt Williamson, a former scout, took over hosting duties for several episodes until suddenly it was announced he was leaving and the show was on hiatus. I'm not sure what happened here, but who knows what ESPN is thinking? It revamped its baseball podcast this year, too, handing it over to Buster Olney, and perhaps it wanted on-air talent to be on the podcast that covered its signature sport. That makes sense. Not having any kind of NFL podcast during the draft season makes zero sense.

Does anybody know what's going on here? Why would a sports media empire that loves to push all things NFL all the time go silent with one of its flagship podcasts? Surely it has some kind of  plan, but then again, I can't imagine any kind of solid plan would allow the show to go dark for several weeks during such a high-profile stretch for the league.

Well, were you watching this space?

Perhaps you should have been.

"But nothing happened," you might say. That's a reasonable response. But let me tell you something specific that did NOT happen here: The Ravens winning the Super Bo--uh, the "Big Game." Had you been watching this space on Sunday, you would not have seen ME do anything entertaining--nor anything at all, really--but you also would not have seen the Ravens win the game, and therefore you yourself would have been a big winner.

I guarantee you that you will never see the Baltimore Ravens win a football championship on this blog. In fact, let this site be a refuge where we can all gather from time to time and maybe pretend it didn't even happen.

If you do keep watching this space, soon you will see something worthwhile. Ah, there I go making promises I don't know that I can keep already.

If you do keep watching this space, soon you will see something.

Cultureshark Cares: A Public Service Announcement

Months ago, when The Greatest Cable Channel Known to Mankind released its Summer Under the Stars Schedule, I rejoiced at the sight of August 5, John Garfield Day, because Turner Classic Movies had finally scheduled "The Breaking Point." This long-awaited--by me, for sure, but
I know others have been on the hunt for it as well--film is on tonight at 10:00 P.M. I'll be clearing my DVR and hoping there's not some kind of freak storm or something.

This 1950 adaptation of "To Have and Have Not" has a distinctive pedigree even beyond its critical acclaim. It stars Garfield, is directed by Michael Curtiz, and as the second adaptation of Hemingway's novel, makes an interesting comparison piece to the Humphrey Bogart/Bacall/Hawks classic "To Have and Have Not." Or so I hear--I've never seen it.

I've wanted to see it for years, and though I figured all those factors I mentioned above, PLUS the fact it's a Warner Brothers picture, made it a likely candidate for a screening on TCM. Well, I figured wrong, and I haven't seen "Breaking Point" listed in the 10 years or so I've had the channel. I've only read about legendary screenings of the film in the wee hours on outlets like
Cinemax, screenings likely made long before I was hip enough to know just how much I should have wanted to see it.

Over the years, I've avoided reading up too much on this one, saving myself for, you know, actually watching it. I just know it's good and that it's "darker." Well, just taking Walter Brennan out of the thing probably makes it at least 50% darker, so I don't know how much that tells
me. Maybe--not a deliberate SPOILER--everyone dies in an A-bomb blast at the end, followed immediately by a Billie Holiday song playing over the credits.

I never saw a definitive reason as to what kept the movie off TCM but let "To Have and Have Not" be a mainstay. Even "The Gun Runners," the later Don Siegel version of the same source material, has made an appearance or two, I'm pretty sure. It matters not now. Catch this rare one tonight!

Since I am feeling particularly caring today, I will alert readers in the Greater Metropolitan D.C. area that Penn State football preview magazines are appearing at Wegman's. I've already snapped up 3 of them. It's nice to see that the top program in the game is well represented throughout the Mid-Atlantic region, and at the best supermarket in the area, no less. Pick up your copies and get pumped up for some college football.

Are you ready for some football? Well, no, but the magazine publishers are

It was a surprising sight at my local supermarket this weekend: Pro football preview magazines! Not even July, and they're already coming. I saw the "Sporting News" mag and I think at least one other; it was hard to distinguish them amidst the slew of college football guides on the shelves.

Yep, a pro football preview magazine...even though there may not be professional football (well, of the NFL variety) this year. I know the lead time is such that there is a lot of pressure to push these rags onto the stands early, and I love 'em even in this digital age--I've been buying 'em for years--but this is ridiculous.

June is too early even in a year without labor difficulties. If there is a prolonged stoppage that cancels games because the greedy owners are trying to stick it to the players (any doubt where I stand?) this magazine is irrelevant. If there IS a deal soon and no games are missed, then free agency starts and players move around like crazy...in which case this magazine is irrelevant!

To its credit, the "Sporting News" preview does have a "Will they play?" headline near the top of its cover. The fact that it needs to include that is a good sign that it's too soon. I hate to say this is a sign of the increasing irrelevance of print media. So I won't.

NFL Lockout--ho hum

The NFL rules America, blah, blah, blah. We all know that. The seemingly fireproof league gets more and more popular every year, at least in terms of objective measures like TV ratings and subjective measures like "buzz," time spent talking about football on ESPN, and shouts heard form your neighbor after the Redskins give up yet another interception return for a touchdown.

Now, however, there is a lockout. Ooh, lockout! Basically what this means is that the greedy owners are trying to bust the players union and force them to take a deal less favorable one than the owners and players agreed to during the previous labor negotiations. See, the owners locked out the players, so it's their "fault," but they don't care if fans blame them, and I'm sure they're banking on the fact that many fans will ignore the reality and give a knee-jerk jeer or two to the "greedy players" for striking (which they're not) and asking for money to play a fun game (and the game may be fun, but the injuries aren't). So there is a lockout, and the season, still a ways off, could be in jeopardy. To this, I say...so what?

I'm sure I'll miss pro football a little more once autumn approaches, but for now, I'm fine with baseball. I think the NFL needs to be taken down a peg or two, anyway, and some humility might be good for this vast corporate entity and the several dozen rich dudes who oversee it. I do feel sorry for all the working people who make a living off NFL games--bartenders, ticket takers, vendors, etc.--and it really stinks that their well-being is threatened by this labor negotiation process. I do recognize that is a significant terrible effect of the lockout. But that's all the more reason to blame the league officials and the owners.

The NFL is fun, sure, but even when fall comes around, baseball, the national pastime, carries us through October. I have a college team to root for every Saturday. I have other interests. Life goes on without pro football, and it could even be better for a while. Hey, maybe an extended cessation of games would force NFL Network to unearth more vintage game broadcasts from its archives, thus making that channel instantly more useful. Maybe ESPN Classic can run some more USFL games. Maybe we can all just read a book, watch a movie, or spend more time with our families outside instead of getting drunk and yelling at the TV or the field for 3 1/2 hours.

So, yeah, right now, I'm fine with a lockout, especially if somehow the players can hold some ground and get concessions and not just roll over for the owners. Unless the Steelers could somehow get a quality offensive lineman or two and a defensive end or an impact defensive back. Then they could well win the Super Bowl this time, and by God, they had better get the chance to do it.

Super Bowl Sunday: Stairway to Seven

Cultureshark is off today in observance of Super Bowl Sunday.

Remember, no matter who wins tonight--and, yes, we all hope it's the Steelers--tomorrow attention will turn to the labor negotiations between the owners and the players association. Just keep in mind that the owners are a bunch of greedy rich people who have been preparing in quiet and not-so-quiet ways for many months to lock the players out. They are the ones who are eager to shut down the sport if they don't get their way.

If there really is a lockout, it'll be a stupid thing, but let's not make the mistake of blaming "greedy players" for it. They may be felons, thugs, and drug abusers, but they are not in the wrong on this one.

No, as you watch the game tonight, remember the men who actually control the sport are the ones who are willing to stop it, and also remember that they don't care about "the fans" any more than the players do. To the contrary, their actions--here I mean actions beyond just those conducted in labor negotiations--indicate they hold fans in contempt.

Enjoy the game, everybody!

MLB Network does it again

MLB Network has another solid offseason programming addition with its "20 Greatest Games" series. Each Monday night, the channel spotlights one of the ranked games of the last 50 yars chosen by an online poll in an hourlong presentation combining archival video, audio from multiple broadcasts of the game, discussions with hosts Bob Costas and Tom Verducci, and interviews with participants.

It's a fun way to spend an hour, and while I'd wish for more old-school and rarer games, and I'm kind of sad this has apparently supplanted "All-Time Games," which offered complete games, I think this is a great idea. This past week's look at a Giants-Marlins playoff game from 2003 was OK, but the week before was a riot.

#20 was a super-high-scoring regular season Phillies-Cubs affair from May 1979, and Costas, Verducci, and guest (and then-Phillies SS) Larry Bowa had a great time looking back at it. Best was when they chuckled along with some of the frustrated announcing clips of exasperated Cubs play-by-player Jack Brickhouse.

The series delivers all the key plays but also finds time for notable un-key plays, like Cubs long reliever (later Tigers closer and MVP) Willie Hernandez swinging and missing horribly in a rare at-bat. Costas and Verducci strike the right tone in showing reverence for the games but having fun with them as well.

I highly recommend this program to any hardcore baseball fan, and I also recommend that NFL Network do something like this. How is it that despite the incredible dominance that pro football has in our culture right now, the MLB Network can so totally slay the NFL Network? With the resources of the amazing NFL empire, plus the machine that is NFL Films, that channel should be much, much better than it is. But despite several high-profile successes like "America's Game" and the recent Top 100 Players of All Time series, there is a real lack of originality going on there, and the channel seems content to run "Total Access" and "Top 10" all the time.

Speaking on Sports (on TV)

ITEM: I watch ESPN "30 for 30" episode on the remarkable story of college great Marcus Dupree.
--This is a fine entry in the excellent documentary series, but it maybe could have been an hour instead of a two-hour program. Still, Jonathan Hock's film is a revealing look at Dupree, who showed immense talent and skill as a running back at Oklahoma before leaving the school--I mean, boarding a plane during the middle of the season immediately after a big game and flying back home--then jumping to the USFL before tearing up his knee.

Think how many parts of that sentence make little sense today, some 25-plus years later: leaving a school like that in season, the USFL, and ending your career with "just" a knee injury. This story is a great time capsule of early 80s football, but it also says things about the player/coach relationship, the crooked world of recruiting, and, yes, race (Dupree hails from infamous Philadelphia, Mississippi) that are relevant today.

When watching then-coach of OU Barry Switzer discuss Dupree, even my wife said he sounded like Switzer treated him poorly. I kind of chuckled and thought, "Yeah, figures--it's Switzer." Then I paused and figured, well, Dupree DID walk out on Oklahoma, and it's no wonder his coach was ticked. Then I paused again and realized, "Nah, it's just Switzer."

ITEM: ESPN fires NCAA football announcer Ron Franklin for making offensive comments to a female colleague during production meeting for Fiesta Bowl.
--I'll accept some blame for this, not because I was anywhere near there, nor do I condone his actions, but I may have jinxed him. While watching a game last week, I somehow got the urge to blurt out something offensive during a play--well, actually, I got the urge to hear an announcer say something offensive during a play--and I pondered who would be the funniest ESPN football announcer to hear say something like that. Guess who I pictured?

I don't know, maybe I had Franklin's history, including a chauvinist-sounding exchange with another female sideline reporter a few years back in my subconscious, but I just thought it would be funny to hear Franklin say something incongruous, silly, and possibly profane out of the blue during a telecast. Unfortunately, he decided to say something stupid at work, and we didn't even get to him hear him make an ass of himself on live TV, so really, nothing good came out of it at all.

ITEM: NFL Network "Top 10" episode counts down greatest Pittsburgh Steelers of all time.
--I enjoyed this on Christmas Eve, but the presentation of the countdown baffled me. Most of the individual segments on the featured players devoted much of the allotted time to showing talking heads griping about the player's placement. I guess NFL Network is trying to "get people talking" and "be edgy" and all that crap. I'd rather the show just put together a list, defend it, and maybe have a segment with people making arguments about the overall list. But why waste time in the rankings with the likes of Mark Madden saying, "There's no way Hines Ward should be on this list," or whatever? Love the idea of a Steelers program on Christmas Eve, NFL Net, but the execution was a little off.

Brooks on Books: Death to the BCS

This is not a "fair and balanced" look at the college football's (lack of) method for determining a champion at its highest competitive level. No, this is an attack on the current system, and if you are like me and think the sport is marred by its illegitimate way of deeming a team a so-called "champion," then you will enjoy this book by several writers from Yahoo Sports (Dan Wetzel, Josh Peter, Jeff Passan).

These guys are out to take down the system from the get-go, and they do so in often scathing fashion, referring to the vested interests who prop up and protect the BCS as The Cartel throughout the book. But they have facts and logic on their side, and even if you don't like their specific suggestion for what SHOULD be done--a 16-team playoff system incorporating on-campus games while preserving the bowls outside of the tournament--you have to admire how they lay out the case against the current non-playoff mess.

And they point out how The Cartel likes to cite that "there is no clear alternative" as one of its reasons for sticking to the status quo. Well, this book offers a well-conceived alternative. I like how "Death to the BCS" exposes how Cartel members, such as Big Ten commissioner Jim Delaney, use straw man arguments and misleading statements--including falsehoods perpetrated before Congress--to obscure the issues and distract from legitimate anti-BCS arguments. The authors do a great job of exposing the inconsistencies even within Cartel talking points.

Much of the information and ideas in this book have been available for a while, but it's all put together in a brisk, coherent presentation that is especially fun to read for fans who yearn for a legit playoff. Perhaps the most enlightening chapter in "Death to BCS" is the takedown of the current crooked bowl system. The authors show how the "guaranteed payouts" hyped by the bowl games are essentially shams, and their explanation of how many teams actually LOSE money by attending bowls is eye-opening.

One thing I like is how, despite their exposure of the inefficiency of the current system and how tons of money goes to wasted expenses (and the pockets of overpaid bowl execs), the authors state their love of the games themselves and find a way to preserve them. They say, hey, more football is always good for them, and they make a convincing argument that the bowls could still survive and even thrive in a post-BCS playoff era of college football. They certainly prove how shallow the talk about "tradition" is in the bowl system. Anyone who wants to protect the tradition of the bowls, well, hasn't it already been destroyed by the move of big games like the Orange Bowl off New Year's Day? And just how good have the games been this year, anyway? I haven't had a chance to watch much action so far, but when I do flip to a bowl game, it's usually a blowout. But they don't want to get rid of them. They just want to improve the system.

Of course, money talks in sports, as it does in everything else, and here the authors rip open the finances of the current structure, but rely on speculation (as opposed to the facts that prop up most of the book) to make the case that their system would make more money for everyone. Now, I agree with their conclusions and believe they are right, but I'm just saying. Still, they offer a great argument that a playoff could be big-time money, and a look at the NCAA basketball tournament should reinforce that belief. This is what makes the current BCS system, and the stubborn adherence to it of the Cartel, so puzzling: all the money being left on the table in order to avoid a reasonable championship tournament.

"Death to the BCS" provides lots of ammo to fans who want to convince their pro-BCS friends. But then again, how many people ARE pro-BCS? The only ones who are are the power brokers who preserve it, and let's hope some people with the influence to influence THEM read this and can do something. For us simple, old college football fans, we get a fun book that provides lots of insights and organizes the facts into an effective argument against what we have, while also providing a viable option to replace it.

Things I never want to see again

I want to get this post in before the holiday arrives, and in fact, I'm reluctant to even do it at all, but I think talking about these things is the only way I will be able to purge them from my mind--in other words, by dumping them on you.

Let me alert sensitive readers and parents of young children that this post may contain shocking imagery that is entirely unsuitable for some individuals. The Classic TV Christmas Festival is on deck, and I want to warn those who enjoy that good, wholesome blogging entertainment that this entry here is not along those lines.

AHEM. 3 things I saw this past week which I never, ever want to see again:

1) Danny Devito emerging nude from the back of a leather couch on "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia." Yeah, there was a context for this. Didn't make it any less alarming. Won't make it any less disturbing for me relating it or for you reading it. Was it funny? Yep, but some might argue spontaneous vomiting on oneself while sitting fully clothed on one's own non-leather couch is also funny. In that case, some would be wrong.

2) Even worse than that sight--which at least had some comic value and advanced the story in a manner of speaking--was what I saw while flipping through the Showtime channels the other night. Oh, if only I had followed the advice of the immortal Larry Sanders and maintained a strict "no flipping" policy. Instead, I saw, "courtesy" of "Californication," the mere mortal Shrug (AKA Evan Handler) and the only slightly less mortal Rick Springfield double-teaming a hooker on a bed--quite possibly David Duchovny's bed, which doesn't make the scenario any more palatable.

As if the visual weren't appalling enough, Springfield chuckled and sang, "You gotta love somebody" while in the act, and, yeah, I should have turned the channel by then, but while groping for the remote in my temporary state of blindness, I found the wrong one and turned the volume up, increasing my horror.

Some of you might think Springfield singing a line from one of his hits in that situation sounds kind of funny, and of course that's what the show was going for there, a certain postmodern kind of shock humor. But I was too busy crying to start any kind of laugh response.

3) As you can tell if you've made it this far, I've been through a lot this week. So it was the last straw when I saw an AP headline about New York Jets coach Rex Ryan: "Ryan won't discuss foot-fetish report." No, no, no. Enough is enough, damn it. I'm tempted to shut down all access to the outside world and curl up with a stack of "Ozzie and Harriet" episodes until Christmas.

Brooks on Books: A football doubleheader

Since it's Sunday, and since we sort of have a Monday night doubleheader now that the NFL has moved the Giants-Vikings game due to weather (how is it everyone was blindsided by a snowstorm in Minnesota?), let's go for two hardcore football works for the return of "Brooks on Books.

If you know an intense pro football fan who loves to analyze the strategies of the game in detail, and who, well, loves to read, here's your Christmas present for that person: "The Games that Changed the Game: The Evolution of the NFL in Seven Sundays." I can't recommend this book highly enough, and I'm surprised it seems a little under the radar considering it's published under the ESPN banner. Former QB and current "Monday Night Football" analyst and noted film junkie Ron Jaworksi wrote this book with the help of TV producers and fellow film fanatics Greg Cosell and David Plaut, and they've created an insightful and fun read.

Jaworski's approach is simple: He chooses seven games that are notable for epitomizing facets of the development of pro football strategies and tactics, that analyzes each in detail. Each chapter digs into X's and O's, and, yes, there are a few diagrams scattered throughout the book, but the text is still accessible. I don't like reading football diagrams, myself, but I love reading Jaworski's explanations of how, say, Buddy Ryan's 46 defense or Dick LeBeau's zone blitz revolutionized the sport. There is great balance between accounts of the specific game and broader mini-histories of the personalities involved (especially the men who crafted these strategies) and discussions of the lasting effects. Plus, Jaworski and his co-authors did more than just watch old films; they interviewed players, coaches, and execs to garner valuable commentary on these "seven games." The result is an outstanding football book. You probably have to be a serious fan to get into it, but it's lively reading with a lot of entertainment value to go with its educational value.

Steeler haters may want to avoid my next recommendation, "About Three Bricks Shy of a Load...and the Load Filled Up" by Roy Blount Jr. This recent trade paperback edition collects the original "About Three Bricks Shy" and combines it with supplemental material and updates Blount published in subsequent years after the original's publication after the 1973 season.

See, Blount hung around the Pittsburgh Steelers for the entire '73 season, and he got a ton of great material out of it, BUT the team didn't reach the Super Bowl till the next season. Of course, Pittsburgh won that game and 3 others as it dominated the decade. This edition includes essays Blount wrote about those teams, as well as some of the key players.

But the heart of the book is "Three Bricks Shy," and it's great stuff. I will warn readers that Blount's style is very self-aware and maybe a bit too clever sometimes. For a good chunk of the beginning of this one, I was thinking that I was learning a hell of a lot more about Roy Blount than I was about the Steelers. Yet Blunt settles down eventually (or maybe I just get used to it), and it becomes an incredible inside look at pro football in the 1970s.

Through his coverage of the entire season, Blount really does cover all aspects of the game. It's far from dated, too, despite the changes that have occurred since 1973. There are thoughtful passages on the violence of football, for example, that still feel relevant in 2010. One thing that is funny is how steroids are treated rather casually (though not with any detail) whereas Blount is careful not to name names when discussing sex lives.

This is a must-read for Steelers fans, but it's also a valuable book for NFL fans with an interest in history. Some might get impatient with Blount's style early on, but if they stick with it, they'll be rewarded with an outstanding "I was there" kind of sports book.

Callousness of sports fans

Last week, I was reading an article on Yahoo about former Chicago Bears quarterback Jim McMahon and how his memory was shot after years of playing football and experiencing the collisions and head trauma that comes with the game.

Nothing in the story itself surprised me, and I will admit that I even may have had a smart-ass thought or two cross my mind about how memory loss can be caused by certain other high-risk behaviors in which McMahon indulged during his heyday. Still, I WAS surprised by the tenor of many of the comments under the piece. All sorts of people felt the need to post those wise-ass remarks, many similar to the ones I had. But there was also a strong current of "So what?" in those comments.

Hey, Jim McMahon lived hard and played hard, and who knows exactly what caused any memory loss issues he may be having today. But the guy is participating in some studies, and maybe he's willing to help out and further the cause of concussion- and head-trauma-related research in sports medicine. So let's give him credit for that.

I'd rather see at least some level of compassion, even if you're a Packers fan, than the kind of comments that kept popping up on Yahoo, many of them basically saying, "Hey, get over it. That's why you get paid the big bucks." Or things like, "I forget things, too, but I don't get paid millions of bucks." You know, that sort of thing.

What these fans are really saying, it seems to me, is, "We don't care what happens to football players as long as we get entertaining games to watch." The money thing is a convenient excuse to justify a certain level of callousness out there. Well, sports fans, I got news for you: This issue is not going away. In fact, it is going to get more and more play as the people we grew up watching get older and experience these kinds of physical issues. Earlier generations of fans have been able to ignore the ravaged knees and the scar tissue of older players, but will we be able to ignore the star quarterbacks of today experiencing slurred speech or loss of mental acuity as they age?

This Jim McMahon story is just one aspect of a much larger thing, and many of the comments I read are just tossed-off casual remarks from people making knee-jerk reactions. But I feel it's symptomatic of a big percentage of the country that just doesn't care about the impact of football on the health of its players. Yeah, these guys get paid a lot of bucks. But does that mean they sacrifice the right to have safe work conditions? I think we should at least continue to look into the issue and start considering the costs of the sport. And I think fans need to consider that some things just may be more important than their God-given right to watch professional football the way they want it to be played several times a week.

Brooks on Books: Football books with attitude

"Namath" by Mark Kriegel and "Long Bomb" by Brett Forrest are two outstanding pro football books, each well-written and packed with vivid details. author Each might put off some readers, though, with his style. Both Kriegel and Forrest assume kind of a tough guy, or at least tough journalist, posture, writing as a streetwise observer who tells it like it is. Neither man is afraid to drop an f-bomb or an s-bomb every now and then, either.

This kind of approach can be tiresome in the hands of the wrong author, but Kriegel and Forrest pull it off with great success. Kriegel's bio, "Namath" sports a bunch of negative reviews on Amazon, with some chiding it for trashing Broadway Joe. I suspect a lot of the bad feedback is due to the writing style and the profanity.

The book itself can hardly be called a hatchet job. Yes, Namath comes off as emotionally distant, a little egocentric, and--as Kriegel constantly calls him--"a hustler." But he doesn't always mean "hustler" in a negative way, and he points out how so many other people and institutions in Namath's life are also part of the hustle. More importantly, "Namath" the book relates with overwhelming force how talented Namath the quarterback was, how charismatic he was, and how flat-out physically tough he was. The reader gets a sense of sadness at how Namath was apparently scarred by the nasty dissolution of his parents' marriage when he was youth, but ultimately Namath finds happiness in the narrative of his life as a devoted, loving dad seemingly at peace with himself.

The lingering sadness you get from "Namath" has nothing to do with the subject's alcohol use, womanizing, or associations with gamblers (actually, those are all fun topics), but rather with the "What might have been?" aspect of the Hall of Fame career. After hurting himself at Alabama, Namath was never the same, and he became a pro superstar and legendary Super Bowl guarantee-man (and victor) on battered knees, ankles, and just about everything else. Kriegel's biography helps you appreciate how Joe overcame all the injuries to become a winner. It's overall a flattering portrait of the football immortal, and better yet, it's an insightful, compelling read.

"Long Bomb" is subtitled "How the XFL Became TV's Biggest Fiasco," and though you might be trying to forget Vince McMahon and Dick Ebersol's 2001 disaster of a football league, it's worth going through all the gory details in this funny, incisive breakdown of the whole deal. The XFL embarrassed not just the WWF (now WWE) and NBC, but it seemed to irk the whole "respectable" sports community and established media. Forrest explains how the league might have had a decent idea or two, but it overreached through a combination of hubris, impulsiveness, and good old-fashioned incompetence.

There are plenty of examples of the incompetence, and Forrest pulls no punches in describing them. The first sentence begins, "The hacks who write the World Wrestling Federation..." Later he describes WWE executive Linda McMahon:

"She was friendly. She was humble. She was gracious. She was full of shit. Not completely full of shit. But there was enough of a cubic-zirconia twinkle in her eye, a static HAL lamp, a register: POWER ON."

That passage sums up Forrest's approach and style pretty well. He's tough, even a little mean sometimes, and he offers up a no-BS stance from a guy willing and probably eager to call out divas like McMahon, NBC Sports honcho Ebersol, and even peripheral figures in the saga like Lorne Michaels (who throws a hissy fit at NBC when week 2's game runs over and delays "Saturday Night Live," forcing changes to ensure no overruns). This isn't a detached, dignified straight telling of a sports/media/business story. You will be aware of the author on just about every page of this book, although the longer it goes, the less prominent the style is. Forrest is talented enough to pull this off, though, and I'd gladly read more of his books (unfortunately, there aren't any, according to Amazon).

Forrest had zero cooperation from some of the principles in the creation and operation of the league, but he had great access to the Las Vegas Outlaws team during that inaugural (and only) season, and he gets telling profiles of players like the notorious He Hate Me, AKA Rod Smart. He skillfully weaves these profiles and sharply observed accounts of the games and the telecasts into the broader narrative of the rise and fall of the XFL.

Well, actually, it's more like the Fall and Plunge of the XFL, but Forrest does point out some wasted opportunities. The league did draw a strong first-week audience. There were some talented people involved behind the scenes. There were fans willing to watch non-NFL football, and some of the TV economics might have made sense under different circumstances.

Under the actual circumstances, though, the XFL was doomed almost from the get-go. "Long Bomb" is a funny and pungent account of a notorious flop, and even if you've tried to forget it, it's worth revisiting in this book.

Brooks on Books: Wrapping up football

It's just about time for baseball season, so this week it's time to wrap up pro football with thoughts on a trio of books I read this past month. I'll start today with, well, the least of the 3:

Inside the NFL: Total Access by Rich Eisen: I had low expectations for this effort from the former "SportsCenter" anchor and current host of NFL Network's flagship program, "Total Access." When I saw "Kukla" of "Kukla, Fran, and Ollie" spelled wrong in NFL Films maven Steve Sabol's foreword, I really worried I was facing a slapdash, sloppy product.

Eisen's book is not a revealing or deep one, but it is entertaining, and it's a lot less sloppy than occasional typos like misspelling Brant Gumbel's name in a photo caption might indicate. Eisen comes off as a rather starstruck guy living out a dream just being associated with the game. Well, not just the game--the NATIONAL FOOTBALL LEAGUE. He seems a little too deferential when mentioning people like Roger Goodell--I can understand being excited to interview George H.W. Bush and Mick Jagger, but Goodell? So you have to accept the reverent tone and the worshipful attitude about the NFL.

But if that's OK with you, Eisen's look at his job through the course of the NFL calendar--from Super Bowl Week to the Combine to the Draft, etc.--is a fun read. I did learn some new things about the league and how it works, and I enjoyed Eisen's anecdotes about antics such as Marshall Faulk guessing his room number at the Pro Bowl (where it's a tradition to charge everything to unsuspecting people who make their room numbers known). It sure sounds like the guy has a good life and enjoys what he does. You don't learn much about Eisen himself, but you do get a sense of the camarderie, fun, and challenges of his profession.

So, yes, this is the least of the 3 football books I read recently, but it does what it sets out to do and offers an enjoyable perspective on the NFL from a TV guy's perspective.

Back later this week with thoughts on two more ambitious and rewarding books.