Screengrab Theatre #3: A main event in any arena in the country

Thanks to the CWF Archives YouTube channel for posting all kinds of great Florida wrestling content, including a 1984 episode with this barnburner:

I have to tell you, the breakdancing before the match was laughable, but the team itself is pretty cool in the ring. One is Brickhouse Brown, and the other is known as "Slick." I was actually disappointed this match was so short.

Cultureshark Remembers...Ivan Koloff and George Steele

Two famous former professional wrestlers passed away last week within a day of each other, and while it may seem like I'm straining to connect the two, I see a resemblance here. Each to me represented the stereotypical "old guy" wrestler. There is a myth that Vince McMahon took rasslin' out of smoke-filled arenas and made it a family event--a myth propagated by...Vince McMahon!

Still, it is easy to think of pre-WWF expansion in the 1980s and post as distinct eras. George Steele and Ivan Koloff had great success in the early days and looked like the archetype of the old TV wrestler--middle-aged, kind of scary-looking, hairy everywhere except the tops of their heads, and most likely quite sweaty.

Yet the two reinvented themselves, in a sense, and thrived during the 1980s, when I happened to become a wrestling fan. Steele went from the savage heel to the beloved "mentally challenged" babyface (and had a memorable feud with RANDY Savage), a comedy character who made kids happy with his green tongue and his tearing of the turnbuckles. A lot of fans didn't like the character--hey, I have to admit I was annoyed that he was involved in Savage's feud with another of my favorites, Ricky Steamboat, as much as he was--but he was one of the more well known among the general public and the casual fans, and he certainly was an attention getter.

Koloff found a career rejuvenation years after winning the World Wide Wrestling Federation championship over Bruno Sammartino in a legendary upset. He slid into a mentor role as the manager/tag team partner of his "nephew" Nikita Koloff, and together the two were a significant act in Jim Crockett Promotions, the organization I always wanted to see more of even when it seemed WWF was all over the place. So years after his physical peak, Koloff changed roles and may have made the most money he ever did, even though he was no longer a main event singles wrestler.

The other thing that links the two in my mind is that both are great examples of the, "Wouldja believe he's really..." phenomenon. You know, it's that deal where you find out a pro wrestler is totally different than his on-screen persona. I think for years the go-to example of this was that George "The Animal" Steele was a schoolteacher in between wrestling gigs. I didn't know until well after I first saw him, but Koloff was not Russian at all. Well, that wasn't a huge surprise, but I didn't know he was a Canadian who was originally billed as an Irishman.

Of the two, I much preferred Ivan Koloff's act, but both were big parts of a misspent youth filled with way too much TV wrestling. R.I.P.

Cultureshark Remembers: Year-End Edition (Part III)

Continuing our look at the notable deaths in 2016 with a recommendation/video for each one:

JULY

Michael Cimino: The Deer Hunter I never saw Heaven's Gate, so don't expect me to offer a revisionist defense of it.

Noel Neill: Instead of picking a single episode of Adventures of Superman, how about the movie serials? Easy to find, and unlike the series, she didn't share the role with Phyllis Coates.

Garry Marshall: I'm a big fan of Marshall's later-years renaissance as a character actor and raconteur, and I thought his role in Louie was a delight.

Dennis Green:

Gloria DeHaven: Step Lively Not a great movie, but I am a sucker for Room Service, and I enjoyed watching this remake of the play/Marx Brothers movie.

AUGUST

Mr. Fuji:

Gene Wilder: Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory Still my favorite (and weirdest) Gene Wilder role.

Steven Hill: Mission Impossible, "Operation Rogosh" One of the best of the pre-Peter Graves episodes with Hill as Dan Briggs.

John McLaughlin:

Arthur Hiller:

Not at all his best film, but it gives me an excuse to post this kick-ass theme song.

John Saunders:

Kenny Baker: Star Wars Why try to be cute?

SEPTEMBER

Jon Polito: Homicide: Life on the Streets The first two seasons of Homicide. Unfortunately, he was unceremoniously dumped from the show after this.

Hugh O'Brian:

Agnes Nixon:

Arnold Palmer:

Bill Nunn: Spider-Man One of my favorite supporting characters in comic books was Joe "Robbie" Robertson, and the Sam Raimi movies featured Nunn doing him justice.

Cultureshark Remembers: Year-End Edition (Part II)

Continuing our look at the notable deaths of 2016, with a recommendation of something to check out, or maybe just an embedded video, to remember each one:

APRIL

Chyna:

Probably the best moment this troubled soul had: Her amazing WTF debut on Raw.

Prince: Raspberry Beret The Man won't let anyone upload the official music video. I understand wanting people to pay for the music, but it's not like you can buy the music video. Uh, at least I don't think you can. Anyway, this is my favorite thing he ever did.

Merle Haggard:

I confess I never really "got" Merle Haggard, but this is great.

MAY

Morley Safer:

Alan Young: Mickey's Christmas Carol He gave an excellent performance as Scrooge McDuck!

Mark Lane:

William Schallert: How do you pick just one thing when the guy was in everything? Let me stray from his looooong TV resume and offer his appearance in The Incredible Shrinking Man, which is representative of his scientist/doctor/authority roles...though he was pretty wrong about Scott's condition!

JUNE

Muhammad Ali: My favorite Ali is the one in Superman vs. Muhammad Ali from DC Comics, but here's something you can view:

Buddy Ryan:

The 30 for 30 on the '85 Bears shows how the coach was both divisive and beloved, but this clip reminds you of how he was often just hated. Now, THAT was a rivalry!

Brooks on Books: Filmish

"Filmish: A Graphic Journey Through Film" by Edward Ross is an amazing read. The Scottish writer/artist uses a graphical storytelling format (it's like a comic book!) to explore film theory. It's like all the highbrow parts of your college Intro to Film Study but with a ton of kick-ass illustrations.

Actually, I am being way too flip describing the book like that. This is a compelling and enlightening work with much to appeal to novices and scholars alike. Ross provides a clever structure by looking at the medium through 7 distinct aspects, each one given its own chapter: eye, body, technology, sets, time, power and ideology, and voice and language. The non-chronological approach is a great way to dive into the possibilities of the medium.

"Filmish" reminds me of Scott McCloud's seminal works on comic books--a narrator whom we see in the pages takes us through the "story" and offers much food for thought while explaining the foundations of film theory. Ross covers everything from Hollywood to Nollywood and includes a broad range of cinematic works in his panels. He scatters interesting bits of trivia throughout as well. There is meticulous documentation for everything so that we not only see where the quotes come from, but if we don't recognize a shot or person in the artwork, we can easily find out its origin.

I think even serious cineastes who know the works cited here will appreciate the way Ross synthesizes all this material. Newcomers should get a real kick out of it. I found the chapter on power and ideology particularly provocative. Ross doesn't try to force his own opinions through, but he does ask many questions while challenging the reader to consider all sorts of issues that are easy to overlook when sitting in front of the tube with a bowl of popcorn.

I should emphasize, though, that while the book covers some serious ground with its discussion of issues like sexism and racism, and it draws on many academic perspectives, it's a lot of fun. I highly recommend "Filmish" to lovers of movies, comics, and especially both.

Cultureshark Remembers...Nick Bockwinkel

Former American Wrestling Association World Heavyweight champ Nick Bockwinkel passed away last week at the age of 80. If you'd like to learn more about him and see him in his prime, don't go to the WWE Network, which still hasn't uploaded much of its AWA footage.

I didn't see him in his prime, but I enjoyed him as a young wrestling fan even though he always seemed kind of "out there." His mannerisms, his look, his style--everything suggested a cocky prick who would more likely hire someone to mess you up--and brag about it at the country club--than to actually mess you  up.

And the name? BOCKWINKEL? I was just fascinated by that name. Bockwinkel. Go ahead, say it out loud. Bet you can't do it just once. You'll want to do it over and over again. It doesn't sound like an ass kicker, but somehow it kicks ass.

But the man could go in the ring. He was middle aged when I got AWA Wrestling on ESPN, and in one of his most memorable matches of the 1980s, he was already about 50 when he battled Curt Hennig to a 60-minute draw. I loved this match, not just for the work in the ring, but for the great overwrought announcing of Rod Trongard. He really worked to get across how momentous the match was, and it was funny, but it was appropriate, and it worked.

After saying they neared the 58-minute mark: I don't know if I have two minutes left.

Then: We're in the final minute. I will never forget it as long as I live, however this ends. With less than 60 seconds remaining, these two men have given everything that there IS to give--not only that they have to give, but there IS to give--to the sport of professional wrestling.  They have pounded, they have hammered, they have clawed, they have dug, they have  put on every hold that they know, every weapon at their command...as we're in the final 30 seconds of this match.

People like to mock the AWA, and it was well past its own prime at that point, but that remains one of my favorite wrestling calls ever, and what a show Bockwinkel and Hennig put on that night.

After Bockwinkel finally left the fading AWA, he had a short run as a color commentator on WWF house shows, with a lot of his work turning up on "Prime Time Wrestling." I loved Bock in this role because I hated what I considered cartoonish aspects of wrestling, and I liked how he treated it like an actual sport.

One thing that always bothered me was when a babyface covered a heel for pin when the referee was knocked out or indisposed, and by the time the ref crawled over to make a count, the crowd would already have reached 10. An announcer would invariably say, "He would have had him if only the referee had been in position!" Now I appreciate more the desire to give someone a "visual pin" to save face before he went on to lose the match, but then I thought it was hokey and took me out of the moment.

One time this happened, and Bockwinkel told his play-by-play partner he wasn't so sure. He explained that a wrestler, through training and instinct, responds to that sound of the referee's hand hitting the mat, and therefore you couldn't assume that he wouldn't have kicked out if the ref had been there earlier. I don't remember how the PBP man responded, but I was elated. Finally, someone says what I've been thinking for so long! That comment alone won me over. Of course, that kind of intelligent, reality-based commentary wasn't a great fit for 1980s WWF, and the gig didn't last long, but I always considered Nick one of the most underrated announcers in pro wrestling history.

5Q Movie Review: "The Flintstones & WWE: Stone Age Smackdown"

Q: Is this just for kids, or can grown-ups enjoy it, too?
A: Well, I'm a grown-up--more or less--and I enjoyed it! I haven't shared it with my kids yet, but I think the question may be more, "Will kids enjoy it as much as the grown-ups?" Sadly, the Flintstones may not be relevant to today's youth. I do realize it is partly my generation's responsibility to rectify that situation. With that in mind, if my kids don't like it, then I'll show them the classic episodes, and by cracky, they'll like those if they know what's good for them.

It's entirely appropriate for kids, at least, though there are some PG elements like some cartoony violence, Fred drooling over the animated equivalents of the Bella Twins, and Fred drooling over Wilma showing off a new bikini (Good Lord, I hope that last statement doesn't actually sell more copies of the DVD). Also, a few touches like a character meant as a Phil Silvers homage will make the adults smile and go over the kiddies' heads...unless their folks are doing the right thing and showing them Phil Silvers' work  as part of a healthy balanced television diet.

Q: Does it FEEL like the Flintstones?
A: It feels enough like the classic version of the show to me. I give the franchise a little slack here; after all, there was not only the original prime-time series, but there were the Fruity Pebbles ads, the Fred and Barney Comedy Hour, and all kinds of revivals. "Stone Age Smackdown" fits in nicely with all of these versions, and it does capture the spirit of the one that started it all. We get names like John Cenastone, animals performing mechanical tasks, and the modern streamlined animation manages to make Bedrock look fine. It's not like Hanna Barbera's television department was known for its lush visual masterpieces, anyway.

The voice work has varying success. I thought Wilma and Betty were fine, but Barney was off to me. Again, even Mel Blanc used several voices as Barney in the original run, so there's not necessarily one sound the character "should" have, but I didn't care for this portrayal, which seemed a little closer to Blanc's early higher version that the later one that I consider MY classic one. As Mr. Slate, John O'Hurley doesn't do anything wrong, but his voice and persona are too established, and it's distracting.

As Fred, though, Jeff Bergman is outstanding, summoning the original flavor of Alan Reed's portrayal. He doesn't just do an imitation, but does subtle things with the way he does the character. This more than any one thing makes this movie "feel" like the Flintstones.

Q: Does it FEEL like the WWE?
A: Let me put it this way: Fred actually uses the term "sports entertainment" at one point, and, yes, even in a cartoon it irritates me to see Vince McMahon's corporate buzzword replace the word "wrestling." The in-ring action itself is tame and nowhere near as exciting as you'll see on the average WWE pay per view, but it gets the job done.

Fred is an amateurish promoter, but he does have some good instincts. I was stunned to see "Vince McMagma," in this story, as a businessman who basically takes Fred's idea for "sports entertainment" and is inspired to run with it. This has to be the only time Vince McMahon has ever not taken credit for inventing modern wrestling, and it's stunning to see even in this format!

The weirdest thing here is that on the "heel" side of the WWE guest list, we only get Mark Henry and CM Punk. Punk is no longer with the country, and Henry was a bigger deal when this was produced but doesn't have much to do here. Punk is fun as the bullying villain of the story, but it would have been nice to see someone else on that side of things to balance John Cena, Undertaker (semi-retired), and Rey Mysterio (also no longer with WWE). The Bella Twins have heelish interactions with Wilma and Betty (I hope THAT doesn't sell a few DVDs), but they don't really wrestle.

The characterizations are fine, though, with the real-life wrestlers bringing exactly what you would want/expect them to bring. I really enjoyed Vince McMahon as Vince McMagma, and I thought he was underutilized.

Q: How in the world do they manage a WWE/Flintstones crossover? Time Travel?
A: I always welcome time travel in cartoons, but in this case, it's not really John Cena and CM Punk interacting with the Flintstones. It's John Cenastone and CM Punkrock. They and the other characters just happen to remind us of current WWE performers.

Fred and Barney are running a charity scam--uh, a charity event enabling people to box with Hoppy, and once CM Punkrock starts beating up the poor hopparoo, owner Barney comes to his rescue, things get physical in the ring, and things go from there. Betty isn't happy about Barney getting in the ring, but Fred sees dollar signs and promotes a wrestling event featuring friends like new co-worker Cenastone and people like The Undertaker. Yes, his character is so protected, he doesn't even get a stone-aged name makeover.

Q: So, bottom line, is it worth it?
A: I laughed out loud several times and enjoyed this a lot more than I thought I would, but I'm in the target audience that would be open to this kind of stunt. I think fans of Flintstones AND modern-day WWE will love this, but they should look for a deal. The feature is only about 50 minutes long. I haven't seen the Scooby-Doo/WWE crossover movie (though after seeing how good this one is, I want to do so), but that one is long enough to be a legit animated feature.

The DVD is filled out with two classic TV episodes--one wrestling-themed, the other baseball-themed. I'm not sure why they include the latter. Perhaps an episode with Wilma's mother-in-law would be more appropriate; she's a bigger heel then even CM Punkrock at his nastiest. It's nice Warner Brothers added these, but the DVD still feels a tad slight.

Still, "Stone Age Smackdown" is a lot of fun, providing family-friendly entertainment in the vein of the original series and adding elements of modern-day WWE-style pro wrestling. If that sounds appealing, you ought to give it a shot.

Cultureshark Remembers Dusty Rhodes

R.I.P. Dusty Rhodes, "The American Dream," one of pro wrestling's true immortals who somehow died today at only 69 years old. As a rabid wrestling fan growing up, I thought the Dream embodied everything that I loved and everything that I hated about the sport (Yeah, of course, I knew, but I called it a "sport," not "sports entertainment." As an adult I appreciated him so much more as a character, and now I think he just embodied wrestling, period.

Let me get this out of the way: When I first got the Jim Crockett Promotions/NWA programming in my area, I always rooted against him. Always. I was entertained by his interviews, but I resented his big shot status in the promotion and thought it killed my suspension of disbelief to see him cleaning house on so many superior athletes.

I was a Ric Flair guy, a Four Horsemen guy, and I couldn't stand seeing Flair get whipped by him. One of the most ridiculous things ever was his "Bionic Elbow," a simple elbow smash that usually showed little impact...or even effort. Worst of all was seeing the Horsemen or pretty much any other heel in the company lining up to take that Bionic Elbow.

Now, of course, I watch Dusty Rhodes footage and think that move kicks ass.  And the fact that I wanted him to lose every match doesn't mean he didn't give me a lot of great memories. Dusty was an integral part of many of the fun angles I enjoyed on SuperStation TBS back in the 1980s--the spike in the eye from the Road Warriors, his "Superpowers" team with Nikita Koloff after Magnum T.A.'s car accident, the Midnight Rider...

Yeah, the whole "wrestler loses a match and has to leave town, then comes back under a mask" gimmick is an old one, but I ate up Dusty's "Midnight Rider" shtick. Something as ridiculous as a fat guy with a big blotch on his belly wearing a mask and claiming to be someone else IS wrestling. So is the ability to address the camera without a script, start yakking, and make everyone in the audience want to see  your match. So is showing up on all the magazines at the grocery store with blood running through your blonde hair and down your forehead. And so is--let's face  it--using your power backstage to push yourself as the top babyface in the company, even if it means glomming off some of the shine from the rising stars. Hey, that's wrestling, too.

Dusty was one of those larger-than-life characters you just couldn't resist trying to imitate. Legend had it his ridiculous--there's that word again--gimmick he got in WWF, the polka-dot-wearing "Common Man" was a joke at his expense. Well, guess what? He was so entertaining that he got over even when saddled with that costume and a middle-aged valet named Sapphire. His massive charisma was clear even on a minor show like "WCW Classics" on the old Turner South. He introduced matches and just generally seemed to be having a good time. I sure as hell had a good time watching him.

Dusty Rhodes was one of the most ridiculous wrestlers ever but also one of the most awesome, because sometimes pro wrestling is best when it's a certain kind of ridiculous. That was Dusty, and that was a big part of my youth. Time to go watch some Dusty moments., and don't be offended if I come up behind you tomorrow and hit you with a Bionic Elbow.

WWE Network: Great idea, but is it great now?

The free trial period of the brand-new "over-the-top" WWE Network (that is, not on cable or satellite, but available online and through some connected devices) ends today. Is it worth the 10 bucks a month it'll cost going forward? Particularly since they are asking for 6-month commitments?

There are a lot of bugs to work out, but if you're a hard-core wrestling fan, this is a no-brainer. If you buy even a few pay-per-view events per year, this is worth it because $10 a month is much, much less than $50 a month, plus you get so much more content. If you're not into wrestling at all, forget about it.

So what about lapsed fans like myself? I haven't watched the current product for years, but I loved pro wrestling for years, and I still enjoy following the industry and watching old footage. So for someone like me, it might be a more difficult choice. Let's look at the good and bad:

GOOD: PPV Value: Every pay-per-view will be shown live and on demand going forward.

The Main Feed: The live stream works pretty well and looks great.

Unpredictability: The exciting array of interstitial footage--old vignettes, miniature feature pieces shot for the network, vintage promos--make for fascinating in-between programming fodder on the live stream. It gives the channel a sense of fun, or better yet, adventure, like the old days of MTV. So much of the element of surprise is missing from today's WWE; it's nice to see some of that restored here.

On Demand: Almost every PPV event of WWE, WCW, and ECW are available on demand. Also, a smattering of other old-school programming, apparently all previously aired on WWE 24/7 (later Classics on Demand) is there.

Access: Kudos to WWE for making all programming closed captioned.

BAD: Limited compatible devices: I hoped I could enjoy WWE Network on Wii, but it is not supported yet. I hoped I could enjoy it on Roku, but it is only available on newer models. I hoped maybe my Blu-Ray would get a WWE Network app, but that is not the case, and there is no indication that it's coming soon. I know many are watching the service on Playstations or other devices, and there have been big problems with XBOX 360. But I am just saying for me personally, I can only use my laptop, and if I connect via HDMI, I can see it on my TV. That's kind of a pain, though. I'd love to have this on as background while I'm doing stuff ON my computer.

Technical Glitches: Signing up was difficult, and many have experienced inaccessibility in accessing the On Demand parts of the network. The big live event, an NXT special last week, was plagued by issues, which has many concerned about the viability of the live broadcast of WrestleMania next month.

No RAW/Smackdown: At least not for 30 days. They are protecting their deals with NBC/Comcast and Hulu (which offers replays), I assume, and that's understandable, but it's disappointing to cord cutters who would love to bypass USA and SyFy.

On Demand Programming: First of all, nowhere near the amount of library footage we hoped would be there is there now. Furthermore, not even all the footage that was reported to be there at launch is there now. Some PPV events were missing at launch. Some of the programs that were there last week have mysteriously vanished. I expected all the home video releases would be there, but so far virtually none of it (other than the PPVs) is.

No Love for Territories: Before Vince McMahon took over wrestling, there was a rich variety of action all across the country in the form of the regional promotions (territories) that ran their own cards and had their own talent. So far there is hardly any of that television even though McMahon owns most of it. Perhaps some of this is due to technical concerns, perhaps much of it is not digitized and network-ready, but a lot of it aired on 24/7 and could be ready to go now. So far, just a few World Class shows are up and an assortment of early ECW. Where's the AWA? Where's the Mid-Atlantic? I don't expect everything to be there at once, and there's still way more there than I have time to sit down and watch, but we were told we would get "unlimited access to the vast WWE library," and the offerings so far at launch are only a fraction of the fraction of that we would even reasonably expect to get. So far very little of what's been released is new, unaired footage to excite the enthusiasts.

No Resume Feature/No Watchlist/Inadequate Search: These are some things that we the viewing public expect from our SVOD (Subscription Video on Demand) services. I'd really like to see a resume watching feature considering much of the most appealing material is several hours in length. Given that finding some of the programming is difficult right now, it would be great to have a Watchlist/Queue where we could stash interesting material once we DO locate it.

Overall, there is a lot wrong with WWE Network, but I have to come back to the value. Depending on your level of interest, this may be an easy decision. I have faith that the technical issues will be resolved eventually, though I do think WWE should extend the free trial by a week as a show of good faith considering how much trouble there was signing up for the service. However, at this point, we have a pretty good idea of what we're getting.

To me the big question mark is the library: How much of the vault will WWE let us see? If the first week's lineup is indicative, I will be very disappointed. If they are saving much of it for after the free trial and if they are diligently working to get more stuff on there, then this will be well worth the cost. The availability of the big events may even get me interested in the current product.

Cultureshark Cares

Last week, a judge ruled in favor of Hulk Hogan in his continuing legal efforts to get Gawker and its properties to remove the sex tape footage it posted last year.

Gawker is defying the ruling so far, but this means if you have yet to see the Hulkster doing the wild thing, you ought to do it now in case the video is pulled.

Cultureshark Cares!

Vault of Coolness: You call that a "Wrestling Album"?

I'm STILL disappointed to see this ad and realize it's promoting a book of photographs and not a record album:


Of course we know that Greg Valentine went on to become one half of the music/wrestling combo Rhythm and Blues with the Honky Tonk Man, but what I wouldn't give to own a vintage recording of The Hammer's rendition of "Something." And who wouldn't enjoy Wildfire Tommy Rich's southern-fried take on Michael Murphey's "Wildfire?"

This week in Netflix Instant Watching

I'll spare you an extended rant about the announced price increase Netflix is inflicting on us in September. The hike is galling considering the company raised prices at the end of last year, but what really irritates me is the elimination of my current membership option and, worse, the gradual phasing out of DVD and especially lack of new catalog releases. I'm watching as many discs as I can the rest of the summer, as come September, I'll likely be going to streaming only, just as Netflix wants me to, and hoping that the content on that side of it continues to expand.

I understand that Netflix is increasing rates at least partly due to rising costs of programming, both current and anticipated, but I don't like the feeling that I am subsidizing the price of a whole lot of programming I don't care about. You know what that reminds me of? Cable.

Anyway, there were a few notable additions to the Instant Watching selection this week, titles I want to highlight because of what larger things they may tell us.

A pair of interesting selections from Shout Factory arrived a few days ago. The great 1990s UPN (and later Adult Swim staple) cartoon series "Home Movies" is now available for streaming. I am not going to make a huge deal out of this now because I have a vague recollection of the show being available before, perhaps when I wasn't yet paying attention to streaming video. But it's a great show and a nice thing to have around as an option.

Far more interesting at this time is the addition of "Dennis the Menace" season 1, the DVD set of which also came out from Shout Factory, and not too long ago, I'll add. It's always nice to see classic TV on DVD product make its way to Netflix streaming, and the presence of this particular licensed property, assuming it's Shout responsible, may bode well.

We know from a recent news amount that Leave It to Beaver, another high-profile classic TV Shout DVD release, is on its way to Instant Watching, but that's from a deal with Universal. Does the presence of "Dennis the Menace," along with series like "Home Movies" and "Larry Sanders," prefigure more old TV shows?

I'd particularly like to see some of those series that Shout has booted to its direct (i.e. more expensive) Shout Select program. Could we see "Room 222" or "Paper Chase"? Does Shout even have the rights to license them to Netflix? Or how about the as-yet-unreleased seasons of those classic TV series? It's not like Fox is doing anything with them.

Come to think of it, Netflix also has some kind of library deal with Fox, but so far it's yielded mostly recent shows, with "X-Files" one that's on the way. When you really get into this stuff, it's hard to keep it all straight.

Another recent addition to Netflix streaming is a cut-down version of WWE's 3-disc "Best of Monday Nitro." It's a bummer the whole thing isn't up there, but WWE has been providing the documentary portions of its video releases, not the whole match content, so it's not surprising that the Netflix version is shorter. But I find this notable because the DVD just came out. It's cool that the WWE product is hitting Netflix fairly quickly...but of course, it's not so cool that it's abridged, and it's really not cool that Netflix is not bothering to stock the actual discs of these releases.

With the DVD acquisitions so far down, it's really important that Netflix put its money where its mouth is, or more accurately put its money where OUR money is, and continue to add exciting and useful new streaming content. I realize the WWE videos may appeal to a limited audience, but that's like icing on the cake to me. What I really want to see is the expansion of the classic TV selection, and hopefully the first season of "Dennis the Menace" is not an exception but an example of many more to come via Shout Factory or other outlets.

Pro wrestling: The intersection of absurdity and tragedy

The world of professional wrestling is often as sleazy and ridiculous as just about any realm of entertainment around, but this story, which I saw at the excellent Cageside Seats, is remarkable. The author of the post is wise enough to pretty much let the story speak for itself, and I will do the same by linking to this Tampabay.com article about a debacle of a recent "tribute show" for "Macho Man" Randy Savage. The account of the memorial offers a combination of "sad" and "funny" in a combination more potent than anything since they heyday of "Punky Brewster."

Allow me to just highlight my "favorite" part of the story, a report on the bungling of the customary 10-bell salute given at ringside for dead wrestlers:

There was no sound system, no bell to ring. In honor of the Macho Man, Puglia held marginally observed moments of silence, repeating "ding" into the microphone.

I'm ashamed for laughing at this--well, not for laughing at this, but for laughing so much at this--but I'm unable to shake the vivid image of a grown man attempting to simulate a timekeeper's bell into a house microphone, and not doing it Michael Winslow style, mind you, but just hoping the onomatopoeia itself will suffice to form a "solemn tribute" to the deceased.

Is there video of this? Only the affection the crowd must have had for the late Macho Man could have prevented the building from erupting into convulsive collective laughter. And while convulsive collective laughter might have its place at a memorial show in certain circumstances, I don't think it's the intended result in this one.

It's easy to sit back and chuckle at the pathetic nature of the event, but the whole thing becomes more sinister when you read that the organizer misused the names of several charities in promoting the event. This raises the incident from a laughable example of small-time pro wrestling incompetence to the reprehensible.

But I still laugh at the thought of that guy saying "Ding" over and over again.

Cultureshark Remembers Randy Savage

R.I.P. Randy "Macho Man" Savage, dead at 58 after reportedly suffering a fatal heart attack then crashing his car. Savage is one of the all-time biggies in pro wrestling, a massive star in both the heady days of 1980s WWF and a key player in the 1990s Monday Night Wars era, when the WWF and rival WCW were making tons of money while running their flagship programs head to head each week. He was a big enough mainstream star to merit a segment on "Sportscenter" yesterday and to star in ads such as his notable Slim Jims campaign.

Savage was not someone I considered my favorite wrestler at any given time, but because he was pitted against some of the performers I most detested watching--Hulk Hogan and Ultimate Warrior--in key feuds and matches, I did root for the guy a lot and get emotionally invested in his work. Plus I always appreciated his ability; in a WWF in which stars often coasted due to organizational pressures, ridiculous travel schedules, and the pressure to not upstage Hogan, Savage stood out for possessing both the tremendous charisma one looks for in a professional wrestling superstar AND the athletic ability and "workrate," as it's known, to deliver inside the ring.

On a personal level, I remember Savage for starring in two pivotal moments in my wrestling fandom. I first started watching in 1985, and the arrival of the Macho Man in the WWF was a big deal. He had cool moves and was an exciting guy to watch, but he was also involved in what I believe to be the first big "angle" (storyline) outside the ring that really captivated me. The WWF treated him as a big deal immediately, and the big question that played out over his initial weeks of television appearances was who would be his manager?

Established heel (villain) managers like Bobby Heenan and Mr. Fuji were shown vying for the right to guide the career of this new superstar, and when the announcement was made and an attractive but timid-looking woman, Miss Elizabeth, emerged as the "winner," it was a real stunner...but an intriguing one. The Beauty and the Beast act became one of the biggest things going in the WWF, and things took off from there.

I remember missing the show on which the news broke, but my aunt's then-boyfriend was over at our house, and we exchanged a little pro wrestling talk when I mentioned I watched it. I think I mentioned the ongoing saga about Savage's manager, and he said, "Oh, yeah, they showed that." "Who? Who was it?" I asked with youthful impatience. "Some CHICK," he replied. "Some hot chick."

I can remember puzzling over that one--who the heck was he talking about?--and also being a little amused, even as young as I was, at his terminology. But, hey, I was INTO that story, and that was the moment when I knew I really didn't want to miss the weekly TV. I had to keep up with this stuff!

The next key moment in my evolution as a pro wrestling fan was Savage's win of the Intercontinental title over Tito Santana. The heel Savage used a "foreign object" to injure and then pin Santana, and I was outraged that the decision stood. Oh, I understood that it was "fake," but even on the storyline level, I thought it was ridiculous that A) the referee missed it and that B) nothing could be done to correct the injustice because "the referee's decision was final." Even in those days before instant replay was so pervasive in professional sports, I thought that was an absurd policy, and I wasted way too much energy in frustration over how illogical pro wrestling was in its depiction of rules. I quickly realized I had to accept some of the conventions of the business--things like stupid referees being blind at convenient points in a match even though it strained credibility--or else I wouldn't be able to enjoy it at all.

As "smart" as I was to the business, though, I was still enough of a "mark" to get wrapped up in things and lose myself in the moment. One memorable moment, and as far as I can remember the last time I kind of had a vague doubt in the back of my head--is this stuff real sometimes?--was when Savage "ruptured the larynx" of Ricky "the Dragon" Steamboat as part of their televised Intercontinental match on syndicated TV in Fall 1986.

Fortunately for me, I can relive this, one of my all-time favorite angles, through the magic of Dailymotion. Click here to see the match and memorable post-match attack the Macho Man executed on Steamboat's throat with the timekeeper's bell. Nowadays, Steamboat's animated selling of the injury might seem a little over the top, but when I watched this, I was blown away by how intense the whole thing was. Yeah, part of me wondered, hey, maybe this time it IS real!

That's the last time I thought that. It's sad in a way that I lost my innocence so early, but I was able to enjoy the spectacle of pro wrestling in many varieties--not just the WWF product--for years. Many of the action I enjoyed included Randy "Macho Man" Savage, who thrived as a superstar in the industry well into the late 1990s. Savage was a complex guy, and there are a lot of fascinating threads of his life, not all of them positive, but my most vivid memories today are of these 3 moments, a trio of incidents that helped shape my progression as a professional wrestling fan.

The Rock says...why can't anyone find me a better movie?

Last week, The Rock made a triumphant return to WWE's flagship program, "Monday Night Raw," and raised the buzz to a level not seen in the company for a long, long time. He merely stood in the center of the ring and yakked for 20 minutes, but that was enough to captivate the live crowd and draw raves from fans and industry followers everywhere.

Seeing the clip and recalling his massive charisma makes me again wonder, why is this guy not a bigger Hollywood star? Granted, he has had a successful movie career thus far, but he's more known for mid-level hits and has yet to find that signature franchise blockbuster smash. I don't think it's a case of Dwayne Johnson being a big fish in a small pond who is unsuited for larger stardom in the larger world of motion pictures. I believe that somehow the movie industry has squandered his gifts.

I mean, whether or not you enjoy pro wrestling--and I might as well declare now that I don't watch the current WWE product--you must concede Johnson possesses a strong blend of presence, comic timing, and cleverness, all in a physically imposing package. Maybe Rock has hurt his own cause by "settling" for REALLY light roles in family-oriented comedies, but when I look at what's going on in movies, I have to wonder, what is it? Hollywood thinks it doesn't need credible action heroes with actual personality?

I've made this call before, and I will repeat it here: Hollywood, you need to come up with a suitable star vehicle for this guy. Don't worry about pleasing pro wrestling fans. Worry about pleasing millions of movie fans who are starved for legitimate ass-kicking cinematic heroes they can buy a ticket to see without feeling embarrassed.

Rhetorical Pop Quiz

While watching some WWE 24/7 this week, I formulated this question:

Which of these 1980s icons consumed the most, uh, "marching powder"?

A) Roddy Piper
B) Hulk Hogan
C) Pat O'Brien

It's tough to watch a Piper interview from the mid-1980s without thinking that something besides Scottish guile is providing inspiration. Hogan's promos are a little less manic, but not exactly restrained.

As for Pat O' Brien, well, I have never seen him on WWE 24/7, but he hung around the NBA in the eighties, and we know what happened to him more recently. Come to think of it, he would have been an outstanding addition to the WWF announce team back then. Sure, Leaping Lanny Poffo was around to do the poetry, but Gene Okerlund could have used some help with the locker room interviews.

Better yet, imagine Pat sitting in the stands at Madison Square Garden during a big event, talking up the celebrities. Or picture him doing "thought pieces" during the show, with maybe a reflective essay closing the broadcast.

This goes directly into my "Should Have Been" file.

Vault of Coolness: C&W=Country and...Wrestling?

I love random or incongruous giveaways and premiums, and this offer(from the same 1971 "Wrestling Revue" I showed a few weekends ago) fits the bill. Take a closer look at option number two.

Buy two years of a rasslin' mag, get a country album. Actually, this seems like a pretty good deal, and I'm not one to complain about the likes of Johnny Cash and Patsy Cline. But especially considering the utter lack of any music-related content in the rest of this issue, I wonder if this offer is more about the assumptions of the publisher than any kind of organic link between C&W and professional wrestling.

Vault of Coolness: Wrestling Revue

Welcome to "Vault of Coolness," the newest ongoing feature on the blog, in which I trot out material from the deep archives at Cultureshark Tower (probably mostly old comic books and magazines for now) and discuss it a bit.

I got this mag at a collectibles emporium in Massachusetts, literally stumbling on a box of old wrestling mags while navigating through the chaos of stacks, piles, and lumps of stuff that clutter the place.

This September 1971 issue of "Wrestling Revue" is well worth the two bucks or so I paid for it, though the "humor and tragedy in wrestling" piece contains precious little of either.

You may notice the words "BIRD BRAIN" scribbled over a picture of "Beautiful Bobby." Throughout the entire article on this wrestler, the original owner of this mag wrote those words. This is the only section that's at all defaced, but here it happens several times. Whoever read this really didn't like Beautiful Bobby, maybe even HATED the guy--enough to change the performer's alliterative moniker to "BIRD BRAIN." That'll show him! Maybe this person went to go see Beautiful Bobby live, and maybe that person got to call him "BIRD BRAIN" right then and there, and maybe the comment was heard and processed by the wrestling villain.

And maybe the heel shed a tear afterwards, reflecting on what a rough way it was to make a living when you had to go out there and endure being called "BIRD BRAIN."

This kind of thing fascinates me, but if it doesn't fascinate you, maybe this will: here's a cool picture from inside the mag, an old mug shot of a "Bobby" who is much more well known today: Bobby Heenan. Looking suave, Bobby!

The day I lost my WWF innocence

This month, WWE 24/7 is bringing back some memories by running two of its pay-per-view events from 1991: Survivor Series and This Tuesday in Texas (yes, they really called it that). I saw the former live, but not the latter, and whole scenario is what convinced me that professional wrestling hated me and always would.

Picture it: State College, Pennsylvania, 1991. I was in high school, and my wresting fanatic friends and I were thrilled that a local sports bar showed WWF PPVs for a cover charge (and probably some kind of minimum, too). What better time could be had than watching the WWF on a big screen, eating some pub food, and irritating the wait stuff by constantly getting free refills on our we're-underage-and-can't-make-you-real-money sodas?

We gathered on a Sunday for the Survivor Series, and, yes, we were all marks because we were paying for the product. And of course we knew it was all a big show. But we didn't quite expect to get ripped off the way we did. You see, the Survivor Series was mainly a showcase for a series of crowded elimination tag team matches. Ultimately, though, the night was dominated by the most prolific tag team in the history of pro wrestling: Bait and Switch.

The show got off to a bad start when figurehead "WWF President" announced some BS reason why Jake "The Snake" Roberts and Randy "Macho Man" Savage, who were bitterly feuding at the time, wouldn't be on the show. Something like it was too dangerous for them to wrestle on the Survivor Series. So they would meet at the next possible day..."This Tuesday in Texas." And wouldn't you know that the WWF just happened to have satellite time reserved for a pay per view special?

Survivor Series 1991 continued, and what was the happiest moment of our night unfolded when Hulk Hogan lost his title to the Undertaker. We were all confirmed Hogan haters, and seeing a rare pinfall loss by "The Chumpster" should have made the evening, esepcially considering the involvement of our beloved Ric Flair. But I think even right after it happened, we knew it was short-lived, that Hogan would get the title back right away. After all, the finish was controversial, and there was gonna be a rematch, and when do you think they could arrange to stage one? You guessed it...This Tuesday in Texas.

Throughout the evening, the announcers kept yammering about what was going to happen on Tuesday instead of focusing on what we were paying to see now. This kind of constant shill is commonplace nowadays in professional wrestling, with TV serving as a long blast of hype for the next PPV...and even during the 90s, PPVs seemed like vehicles to promote the next night's TV show. At the time, though, this wasn't done so much.

Sure, we enjoyed our sodas and wings and burgers, but we were paying money to see a TV show. But instead of putting on the best TV show it could, the WWF turned one of its showcase events into a long commercial for another expensive program a mere two days later, one that the bar, as far as we knew, wouldn't even be showing. Besides, it was on a school night.

Not that we would have rushed back two nights later to shell out for that. Yes, we knew wrestling was a con before that Sunday night, but witnessing the big sell for That Tuesday in Texas was the first experience we had paying for the product and getting screwed. From that point on, we knew all too well the nature of the relationship between the industry and its consumers.

So I get a real kick out of watching Survivor Series again after all this years and, more importantly, finally seeing This Tuesday in Texas. I can appreciate the ridiculous bait and switch of the former now that I'm older and wiser and not as invested in it. As for the latter, it's fairly weak except for that Savage-Roberts match (which didn't even end their feud, meaning that it would drag on to yet another big event), and I'm glad I didn't fall for their scheme and pay for it back then.

Of course, now that I think about it, I watched This Tuesday in Texas on WWE 24/7...which is...wait a minute...a pay service. I pay every month to see this stuff.

D'oh! They're STILL getting me!

Cultureshark Remembers S.D. Jones

Longtime WWF performer S.D. Jones died recently, and though he was a forgotten man in recent years, he received tons of exposure from being around in the so-called expansion era, as Vince McMahon took his father's wrestling group from a Northeast-based concern to a huge promotion with international reach. "Special Delivery" seemed to be on TV just about every week as the WWF became part of mainstream culture.

If the guy got his butt kicked just about every week, well, that doesn't mean he is any less deserving of our respect, does it? It's tempting to write something about how the eternal loser will finally be at peace now, or that he "lost one more match," or to go the other route and talk about how he was more of a winner than anyone in the federation, or something like that. But really, I just want to say he seemed like a cool guy, and in his own way he was a vital part of 1980s WWF programming, and therefore my childhood.

S.D. was actually a champion before becoming a preliminary wrestler/jobber/enhancement talent, but I knew him as the guy who either got squashed by King Kong Bundy or wrestled interminable 20-minute matches against the likes of Rene Goulet on "Prime Time Wrestling." Every now and then, he'd team up with a superstar like Andre the Giant against, say, Bundy and Big John Studd, and while it was nice to see him in that spot, there wasn't much suspense as to who was gonna get the beating in THAT match.

His claim to fame in the Modern WWF era was losing in what was billed as "record time" to Bundy at Wrestlemania II. In typical pro wrestling fashion, the match time was announced as 9 seconds, even though if you watch it today and pay attention, you realize it's practically longer than your average Duran Duran video.

I don't know if he had a finishing move per se, other than a rollup or a devastating headbutt (in pro wrestling, anyone with pigment darker than Pat Boone has an indestructible skull). I do know he had a mysterious crevice in his back that always made me and my friends wonder. What was the deal with that dent? Why didn't he use it to his advantage and hide some foreign objects in there? Just imagine how much we would have speculated about that thing in his back if he hadn't spent so much time getting pinned on it.

He lost his share of matches, all right, but he was a reliable performer and a mainstay on a lot of popular WWE shows. As either an acknowledgement of his popularity or a tribute to his good-soldier status, LJN made a doll of Jones in its popular Wrestling Superstars line. It's a great likeness, and I'm proud to say I used my own S.D. figure for more than just getting beaten up by my King Kong Bundy figure.

(Thanks to the website A Tribute to the WWF's LJN Action Figures for the great scan)