Let's celebrate Lincoln's birthday this year by looking not at Abraham Lincoln the statesman, not Abraham Lincoln the orator, but Abraham Lincoln the television performer!
TV Time: Abraham Lincoln in Sci-Fi Television
Trivia lovers often point out the eerie similarities between two acclaimed United States presidents who were both struck down by assassins. While an amusing number of coincidences do indeed connect Abraham Lincoln and John F. Kennedy, there is at least one huge difference: While Honest Abe is all over classic TV, it's hard to find JFK.
Click right here for the rest, and tell 'em Cultureshark sent ya! Don't you dare miss it!
Friday, February 10, 2017
Hey, why are these channels never in the Streaming Video Power Rankings?
After 45 weeks, you have probably seen some trends emerge in the weekly SVOD top 10--Netflix is almost always number 1, for example--and some prominent channels are often absent while a relative obscurity like Pub-D-Hub is a staple of the list. It seems like a good time to remind everyone, including some of our newer readers, why some of these high-profile streaming video on demand outlets rarely place:
CBS All-Access: I don't watch CBS shows on CBS, so why would I pay 6 bucks a month to see them here? I suppose it's a nice concept, to be able to watch CBS shows whenever you want (assuming you don't have access to an on demand library through a cable provider), but to charge for this stuff, they need a lot more. I just don't get the pitch. Hey, watch our shows plus SOME of our classic content! There are some old series that are intact, but otherwise it's like, here's a season of 90210. Here's half of The Brady Bunch. Here's more than half of the original Odd Couple. Here's just over half of I Love Lucy. Uh, no thanks. Hulu offers most of the classic content and shows from ABC, FOX, and NBC among many others, for only a few extra bucks a month. This service is way overpriced. Even the free trial is skimpy: One measly week.
NFL Now: I am not even sure if the NFL has a Roku channel right now. It keeps disappearing. When it is around, it offers clips and ads to buy a fuller package. I've hoped for years it would open up the vaults and offer full access to the NFL Films library and original game broadcasts, but for now the league is content to run this as a propaganda outlet and to spend its time removing cool old videos from YouTube even though it has no intention of offering similar content to anyone.
Crackle: The news that Comedians in Cars Getting Coffee was moving to Netflix was only the latest sign that Sony appears to be giving up. This free service is often not worth even "free" because it is so difficult to navigate. There was a time when it looked like Crackle was serious about adding interesting content each month, but it's been going through the motions for months now.
Filmstruck: It seems to have squandered a lot of the goodwill it generated with its announcement by botching the launch. Now I don't hear anything about this pricy niche service, it still hasn't offered Roku support, and when I tried to check out its library last week, the site failed on two different web browsers.
Brown Sugar: "Like Netflix, only blacker." Even though a lot of its presumed content is available elsewhere or has been around the SVOD block, I'd love to take advantage of the free trial and sample this Blaxploitation streaming service, but so far it's pretty much PC only.
CBS All-Access: I don't watch CBS shows on CBS, so why would I pay 6 bucks a month to see them here? I suppose it's a nice concept, to be able to watch CBS shows whenever you want (assuming you don't have access to an on demand library through a cable provider), but to charge for this stuff, they need a lot more. I just don't get the pitch. Hey, watch our shows plus SOME of our classic content! There are some old series that are intact, but otherwise it's like, here's a season of 90210. Here's half of The Brady Bunch. Here's more than half of the original Odd Couple. Here's just over half of I Love Lucy. Uh, no thanks. Hulu offers most of the classic content and shows from ABC, FOX, and NBC among many others, for only a few extra bucks a month. This service is way overpriced. Even the free trial is skimpy: One measly week.
NFL Now: I am not even sure if the NFL has a Roku channel right now. It keeps disappearing. When it is around, it offers clips and ads to buy a fuller package. I've hoped for years it would open up the vaults and offer full access to the NFL Films library and original game broadcasts, but for now the league is content to run this as a propaganda outlet and to spend its time removing cool old videos from YouTube even though it has no intention of offering similar content to anyone.
Crackle: The news that Comedians in Cars Getting Coffee was moving to Netflix was only the latest sign that Sony appears to be giving up. This free service is often not worth even "free" because it is so difficult to navigate. There was a time when it looked like Crackle was serious about adding interesting content each month, but it's been going through the motions for months now.
Filmstruck: It seems to have squandered a lot of the goodwill it generated with its announcement by botching the launch. Now I don't hear anything about this pricy niche service, it still hasn't offered Roku support, and when I tried to check out its library last week, the site failed on two different web browsers.
Brown Sugar: "Like Netflix, only blacker." Even though a lot of its presumed content is available elsewhere or has been around the SVOD block, I'd love to take advantage of the free trial and sample this Blaxploitation streaming service, but so far it's pretty much PC only.
Wednesday, February 8, 2017
Hazel: The Early Years: Episode 3, Hazel Plays Nurse
All you Hazel fanfic writers hoping to see Shirley Booth in a nurse outfit, settle down. That doesn't happen in this episode--Hazel doesn't even get to wear the spiffy new dress she bought for Harold's school ceremony--but we do learn that she is "a licensed vocational nurse." It's not brain surgery, she says, but it's the best you can do with night school.
And you DO get to see Don Defore in flannel pajamas as Hazel (with an assist from the local doctor, who confirms her diagnosis) forces Mr. B to bed with that dreaded calamity known as...A COLD.
Yes, the cold is so feared that it sidelines not just George, but his most valued and most annoying client, the "steamroller" himself, none other than Howard Smith as Mr. Griffin! Yes, episode 3 features the historic debut of the semi-regular, and he's grumpy and irritable from the beginning, though at least this time there's an excuse: Poor widdle baby has a widdle cold.
To his credit, Griffin doesn't want to rest up. He wants to do work, so much so that he barrels into the Baxter household, marches upstairs, and starts going over "important papers" with attorney George...
...which leads to Hazel discovering HE'S sick and confining him as well. One of the best things about this episode is the bluster of the menfolk when confronted with Hazel's strong will. Both George and Griffin declare that if anyone thinks they're going to bed, they're crazy, followed of course by a quick cut to them in bed.
Interesting, though, that even in this first appearance, Griffin does a quasi-babyface turn, relenting on a negotiation George conducts over the phone, then telling George Hazel reminds him of his dear, old mother after putting on her wool socks (Nothing weird about any of this, friends). I kept expecting him to go ape over some homemade soup Hazel whipped up, but he only gets to share the croup kettle she got out for Mr. B, so his intense love of her cooking will be revealed in a future episode.
"Hazel Plays Nurse" is a solid effort, with plenty of patented shots of Don Defore being taken aback by what goes on around him. At the breakfast table, before being diagnosed with that devastating cold, he remarks on the "bedlam" around him, which consists of the school bus (driven by prolific character actor Norman Leavitt) picking up Harold. Whoa, total chaos!
The subtext of the episode, as it is throughout the series' run is the politics of the working class. Fred the milkman complains to Hazel how he has the longest route of anyone because his boss is trying to make him quit so he can give the job to his brother-in-law. Hazel manages to get a phone extension installed in the Baxters' bedroom, and she does so through her connection to Gordy, who is outside working on a telephone pole. He's booked on a tight schedule (by "The Man," no doubt), but he agrees to do the work pronto when Hazel threatens to withhold...bowling lessons (I TOLD you to settle down).
Harold's school presentation will feature his reciting the Pledge of Allegiance, to which I say, big deal. Oh, I am not dissing the Pledge, but why is this such an event? My kids say it every single day, yet Hazel and Dorothy are acting like Harold's recital of it is a State of the Union address. Later, with George in bed, Missy insists that Hazel attend the school event because she can't leave George alone. it's a nice gesture because she knows Hazel bought a new outfit for the occasion, but, jeez, it's YOUR son, as Hazel says in so many words. Thankfully, Hazel overrides her boss' orders--why should this be different than any other time--but I don't see why both couldn't go. George has a cold, not dengue fever.
Finally, there's a great cold open with George bragging to Harold about his football exploits. "They used to call me End Run Baxter," he boasts. Well, when he gets Scrap Iron Burke to snap the ball to him, he goes End over Tea Kettle:
And you DO get to see Don Defore in flannel pajamas as Hazel (with an assist from the local doctor, who confirms her diagnosis) forces Mr. B to bed with that dreaded calamity known as...A COLD.
Yes, the cold is so feared that it sidelines not just George, but his most valued and most annoying client, the "steamroller" himself, none other than Howard Smith as Mr. Griffin! Yes, episode 3 features the historic debut of the semi-regular, and he's grumpy and irritable from the beginning, though at least this time there's an excuse: Poor widdle baby has a widdle cold.
To his credit, Griffin doesn't want to rest up. He wants to do work, so much so that he barrels into the Baxter household, marches upstairs, and starts going over "important papers" with attorney George...
...which leads to Hazel discovering HE'S sick and confining him as well. One of the best things about this episode is the bluster of the menfolk when confronted with Hazel's strong will. Both George and Griffin declare that if anyone thinks they're going to bed, they're crazy, followed of course by a quick cut to them in bed.
Interesting, though, that even in this first appearance, Griffin does a quasi-babyface turn, relenting on a negotiation George conducts over the phone, then telling George Hazel reminds him of his dear, old mother after putting on her wool socks (Nothing weird about any of this, friends). I kept expecting him to go ape over some homemade soup Hazel whipped up, but he only gets to share the croup kettle she got out for Mr. B, so his intense love of her cooking will be revealed in a future episode.
"Hazel Plays Nurse" is a solid effort, with plenty of patented shots of Don Defore being taken aback by what goes on around him. At the breakfast table, before being diagnosed with that devastating cold, he remarks on the "bedlam" around him, which consists of the school bus (driven by prolific character actor Norman Leavitt) picking up Harold. Whoa, total chaos!
 |
| "Spare me your so-called witticisms, Hazel." |
 |
| "Oh, for crying out loud..." |
The subtext of the episode, as it is throughout the series' run is the politics of the working class. Fred the milkman complains to Hazel how he has the longest route of anyone because his boss is trying to make him quit so he can give the job to his brother-in-law. Hazel manages to get a phone extension installed in the Baxters' bedroom, and she does so through her connection to Gordy, who is outside working on a telephone pole. He's booked on a tight schedule (by "The Man," no doubt), but he agrees to do the work pronto when Hazel threatens to withhold...bowling lessons (I TOLD you to settle down).
Harold's school presentation will feature his reciting the Pledge of Allegiance, to which I say, big deal. Oh, I am not dissing the Pledge, but why is this such an event? My kids say it every single day, yet Hazel and Dorothy are acting like Harold's recital of it is a State of the Union address. Later, with George in bed, Missy insists that Hazel attend the school event because she can't leave George alone. it's a nice gesture because she knows Hazel bought a new outfit for the occasion, but, jeez, it's YOUR son, as Hazel says in so many words. Thankfully, Hazel overrides her boss' orders--why should this be different than any other time--but I don't see why both couldn't go. George has a cold, not dengue fever.
 |
| Somewhere in an old lady's sitting room, a sofa is missing its upholstery |
Finally, there's a great cold open with George bragging to Harold about his football exploits. "They used to call me End Run Baxter," he boasts. Well, when he gets Scrap Iron Burke to snap the ball to him, he goes End over Tea Kettle:
Monday, February 6, 2017
Brooks on Books: Backstage with the Original Hollywood Squares by Peter Marshall
Peter Marshall has lived a fascinating life filled with a wide variety of accomplishments. If a recent podcast appearance is any indication, he remains active and erudite at age 90, with plenty of stories about his entire career.
This book is not about his entire career, though. After a brief bit of biographical info, Marshall gets right into the story of Hollywood Squares, the iconic game show he hosted from its inception in 1966 until 1981. It's a fun read, packed with anecdotes, trivia, and personal remembrances but also solid history of the series itself.
Marshall talks about the origins of Squares, how he got the gig (replacing pilot host Bert Parks), and shares his views on regulars like Paul Lynde and Wally Cox (a surprising character in many ways) as well as the numerous other celebs who served on the panel over the years. The book is warm--Marshall's memories of the show are almost all fond--and his portrait of the cast and crew as a mostly happy family should please fans. Marshall doesn't go into detail about the drinking that took place on taping days, but he doesn't shy away from it, either, and he has (relatively tasteful) tales of off-camera debauchery that took place when the show traveled on junket-type expeditions or just shot on location. There's a brief anecdote involving Pat Buttram and a prostitute that caught my attention.
It's a surprisingly candid account with some naming of names, but Marshall has genuine fondness for his colleagues and most of the guests. Some celebrities who weren't even on the show don't come off so well. Take John Wayne, who wrote Marshall an angry letter after being used as a punchline in one episode, saying, "I God damned well resent..." the reference.
The process of making the show and putting together the questions is a compelling tale. The producers weren't allowed to give guests the questions, but they provided bluffs/zingers to use and kind of gave them enough info to know what to prepare their "ad-libs" about if they weren't gonna get assistance from the writers.
There are lots of tidbits in here, but here's a sampling of some of his picks in various categories:
This book is not about his entire career, though. After a brief bit of biographical info, Marshall gets right into the story of Hollywood Squares, the iconic game show he hosted from its inception in 1966 until 1981. It's a fun read, packed with anecdotes, trivia, and personal remembrances but also solid history of the series itself.
Marshall talks about the origins of Squares, how he got the gig (replacing pilot host Bert Parks), and shares his views on regulars like Paul Lynde and Wally Cox (a surprising character in many ways) as well as the numerous other celebs who served on the panel over the years. The book is warm--Marshall's memories of the show are almost all fond--and his portrait of the cast and crew as a mostly happy family should please fans. Marshall doesn't go into detail about the drinking that took place on taping days, but he doesn't shy away from it, either, and he has (relatively tasteful) tales of off-camera debauchery that took place when the show traveled on junket-type expeditions or just shot on location. There's a brief anecdote involving Pat Buttram and a prostitute that caught my attention.
It's a surprisingly candid account with some naming of names, but Marshall has genuine fondness for his colleagues and most of the guests. Some celebrities who weren't even on the show don't come off so well. Take John Wayne, who wrote Marshall an angry letter after being used as a punchline in one episode, saying, "I God damned well resent..." the reference.
The process of making the show and putting together the questions is a compelling tale. The producers weren't allowed to give guests the questions, but they provided bluffs/zingers to use and kind of gave them enough info to know what to prepare their "ad-libs" about if they weren't gonna get assistance from the writers.
There are lots of tidbits in here, but here's a sampling of some of his picks in various categories:
Favorite celebrity square: George Gobel
Least favorite: Jackie Mason (long-winded, would interrupt all the other celebrities)
Biggest pain in the ass: Tony Randall (He just went on and on one time and was so busy being "witty and erudite" that it slowed the game, and Marshall actually called him out on the air.)
Sexiest woman ever on the show: Diana Rigg (She showed up her first time wearing a t-shirt that said TITS. "Classy!)
Funniest square ever: Mel Brooks
Star with the least understanding of how to play the game: Groucho Marx (Marshall says he kept talking because he thought the show needed to avoid dead air.)
The only contestant who later returned as a star: OJ Simpson (No comment.)
There is a master list of celebs who appeared as Squares at the end, and I would accuse Marshall of padding, but there's plenty in here to provide good value, and he seems sincere in his desire to provide a record for posterity. Learning that Norman Fell was a good friend of Burt Reynolds or that Richard Burton had designs on Karen Valentine (not that I blame either one of those guys) is almost enough to make this a worthwhile read, but the whole book is an engaging experience and a must for anyone interested in the original incarnation of the classic game show.
Saturday, February 4, 2017
Streaming Video Power Rankings Week 45 (Special "It's not the Big Game, it's the SUPER BOWL" edition)
While we all sit down to watch commercials on Sunday, let's remember that one of the reasons we fled to streaming video was to flee all the ads on broadcast and cable television.
1) Netflix: Just on additions alone, Netflix is standing tall this week: A new Drew Barrymore series, Finding Dory, The People vs. O.J. Simpson... An intriguing new title is Pioneers of African-American Cinema, a version of the DVD release from Kino spotlighting all sorts of films, including genre efforts and short subjects, from the 1920s to the 1950s. Given the steady decline of archival material on Netflix, this is a welcome surprise.
2) YouTube: It's nice for a grieving Steelers fan to discover someone has uploaded random 1980s game broadcasts this week. Combine one of those with some great 1970s/80s promos and commercials from various channels, and I might have my alternative "Big Game" celebration. By the way, it detracts from the game experience, perhaps, but it's nice to be able to see all the Super Bowl ads here before the game. That way, we can just grab food during the breaks in the game, the way the Lord intended.
3) Amazon Prime: The footage of Joe Frazier singing "Proud Mary" at the beginning of his Greatest Sports Legends episode was almost enough to justify my Prime fee this month. Yet I also enjoyed The Man in the High Castle, and while I did not enjoy Woody Allen's Crisis in Six Scenes, it was my own fault for watching all 6 episodes. I am saying farewell to Prime after this weekend, so it may not place as high for a while, but the arrow is up on this one overall.
4) Hulu: These guys have to be disappointed at the lack of talk about Chance and Shut Eye, right? However, Hulu is making a big push for upcoming A Handmaid's Tale, including a Super Bowl commercial.
5) Shout! Factory TV: Another routine update--a little Jerry Lewis, a little Cavett, a little MST3K--but it remains free, like I say just about each week. Plus this week I enjoyed a show with Cavett interviewing Ted, er, ah, Kennedy.
6) Pub-D-Hub: This week, the Pub added a few episodes of series that I don't see floating around as much: The Americans (a young Robert Culp in this one) and Michael Shayne
7) TuneIn: I heard way more Air Supply this week than any man should in a short period of time. I won't tell you how many songs that is and if it's more than 1.
8) PBS: Quietly offers a solid experience, adding shows shortly after air, then giving you a few weeks to watch them before yanking them or moving them behind their paywall. I enjoyed two solid documentaries this week. Only quibble: The continue watching function doesn't work for me anymore.
9) TubiTV: Another quirky (Quigley Down Under) batch of additions for February, including True Confessions, a movie I think I have intended to watch on 3 different SVODs and probably 4 different times on Netflix alone. Maybe this time I'll actually see it!
10) The CW: My superhero shows are back, and I'm already hopelessly behind again. I will be watching a lot of CW once I lose Prime.
1) Netflix: Just on additions alone, Netflix is standing tall this week: A new Drew Barrymore series, Finding Dory, The People vs. O.J. Simpson... An intriguing new title is Pioneers of African-American Cinema, a version of the DVD release from Kino spotlighting all sorts of films, including genre efforts and short subjects, from the 1920s to the 1950s. Given the steady decline of archival material on Netflix, this is a welcome surprise.
2) YouTube: It's nice for a grieving Steelers fan to discover someone has uploaded random 1980s game broadcasts this week. Combine one of those with some great 1970s/80s promos and commercials from various channels, and I might have my alternative "Big Game" celebration. By the way, it detracts from the game experience, perhaps, but it's nice to be able to see all the Super Bowl ads here before the game. That way, we can just grab food during the breaks in the game, the way the Lord intended.
3) Amazon Prime: The footage of Joe Frazier singing "Proud Mary" at the beginning of his Greatest Sports Legends episode was almost enough to justify my Prime fee this month. Yet I also enjoyed The Man in the High Castle, and while I did not enjoy Woody Allen's Crisis in Six Scenes, it was my own fault for watching all 6 episodes. I am saying farewell to Prime after this weekend, so it may not place as high for a while, but the arrow is up on this one overall.
4) Hulu: These guys have to be disappointed at the lack of talk about Chance and Shut Eye, right? However, Hulu is making a big push for upcoming A Handmaid's Tale, including a Super Bowl commercial.
5) Shout! Factory TV: Another routine update--a little Jerry Lewis, a little Cavett, a little MST3K--but it remains free, like I say just about each week. Plus this week I enjoyed a show with Cavett interviewing Ted, er, ah, Kennedy.
6) Pub-D-Hub: This week, the Pub added a few episodes of series that I don't see floating around as much: The Americans (a young Robert Culp in this one) and Michael Shayne
7) TuneIn: I heard way more Air Supply this week than any man should in a short period of time. I won't tell you how many songs that is and if it's more than 1.
8) PBS: Quietly offers a solid experience, adding shows shortly after air, then giving you a few weeks to watch them before yanking them or moving them behind their paywall. I enjoyed two solid documentaries this week. Only quibble: The continue watching function doesn't work for me anymore.
9) TubiTV: Another quirky (Quigley Down Under) batch of additions for February, including True Confessions, a movie I think I have intended to watch on 3 different SVODs and probably 4 different times on Netflix alone. Maybe this time I'll actually see it!
10) The CW: My superhero shows are back, and I'm already hopelessly behind again. I will be watching a lot of CW once I lose Prime.
Thursday, February 2, 2017
On the Radio: "You May Be Right" by Billy Joel
I'm gonna get right to it this time: Why in the heck does Billy Joel's character tell a woman, "and you told me NOTS to drive," in this song?
Seriously. Listen to it again. The official lyric is:
And you told me not to drive
But I made it home alive
So you said that only proves that I'm insane
Sure, that's what Big Publishing WANTS us to think. But what Joel actually says is, "You told me NOTS to drive." What's up with that?
Is it supposed to show how CRAZY this guy is? "Whoa, that lunatic talks like Sheldon Leonard! He IS insane!" (NOTE: I have no idea what that Sheldon Leonard reference means)
Is it Billy Joel's way of slipping in something a little extra edgy? Does it have something to do, somehow, some way, with dynamic range/mixing/some other technical aspect of the recording process I don't actually care about?
Am I crazy?
Seriously. Listen to it again. The official lyric is:
And you told me not to drive
But I made it home alive
So you said that only proves that I'm insane
Sure, that's what Big Publishing WANTS us to think. But what Joel actually says is, "You told me NOTS to drive." What's up with that?
Is it supposed to show how CRAZY this guy is? "Whoa, that lunatic talks like Sheldon Leonard! He IS insane!" (NOTE: I have no idea what that Sheldon Leonard reference means)
Is it Billy Joel's way of slipping in something a little extra edgy? Does it have something to do, somehow, some way, with dynamic range/mixing/some other technical aspect of the recording process I don't actually care about?
Am I crazy?
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