Classic Shows That Should Be Streaming: 5 for...Walmart?

Folks, you know this gimmick is on fumes when I am picking TV shows for services that don't exist. Sure, I did this for Disney and DC, but at least we know those are on the way. All we have for Walmart is an increasingly noisy level of chatter, some of it coming from the company itself. The idea is that the retail behemoth can challenge Netflix, Hulu, and Amazon with programming that targets "Middle America."

Hoo boy. Middle America! Anything talking about targeting Middle America is bound to be condescending, generalized, and centered on simplistic stereotypes. So naturally I want in!

What kinds of shows can such a service stream--shows that aren't already available on the umpteen OTT services so many already have? Maybe the idea is that the elites have a dozen different streamers, but 'Murica has maybe Netflix...and it would gladly dump it if it could get a HEARTLAND streaming service.

(BTW, the family drama Heartland, which has horses and ranches, is already available to stream on...Netflix, Hulu, and Amazon.)

Here are some things I would like to see:

1) The Brady Bunch: Right off the bat I am breaking one of the rules of this series. See, the Bradys are on Hulu and on CBS All-Access. Ah, but I make an exception here because the Brady brand is perfect for Walmart, and for some odd reason (don't tell me music rights), neither Hulu nor CBS All Access has the complete series.

Walmart could hype the complete series, plus the movies, the variety show, the Brady brides series, the Brady kids 'toon, and, yes, even the ill-fated The Bradys dramedy. It could spur CBS/Paramount to do some kind of retail-friendly repackaging of the DVDs--maybe a Blu-Ray? And it could make at least a mild splash by using the still-famous Brady name as a marquee family-friendly property to tout at launch.

2) Hee Haw: What comes to mind when you think of the long-running syndicated variety show Hee Haw? Country music, cornfields, and corny comedy. Does any of that seem out of place with Walmart? Apart from a few Time Life DVD releases and a regular spot on RFD, the series doesn't have a lot of visibility anymore. Fine! Let Walmart swoop in and buy SVOD rights to a few hundred or so episodes.

3) Johnny Carson: I say Carson instead of The Tonight Show because that's how the show is billed on Antenna TV: Johnny Carson. Who better represents classic TV and "Middle America" than the Midwestern icon of late night?

I bet Walmart could strike a deal with the Carson estate to get a bunch of the episodes on its new streaming services. Again, there could be a neat retail tie-in opportunity.  Talk show reruns may not seem like a big deal in 2018, but Hulu has Merv Griffin episodes. I know I would watch the heck out of these. Carson Enterprises was uploading free episodes to YouTube for a while, so it is not totally against streaming.

4) Barnaby Jones or Columbo: Have you ever noticed that the stereotypical conception of "flyover country" is uncomfortable with "smut" but is just fine with crime and murder? Hey, Barnaby is old, he solves crimes, he was on The Beverly Hillbillies--let's throw him and nearly 180 episodes' worth of soothing, inoffensive 1970s detective television on WalmartVision.

Or how about Columbo? Everyone loves this show, and it is a fixture in syndication but a streaming orphan since all the Universal shows left Netflix. Personally, I like Columbo  better, but I would get a kick out of the whole run of Barnaby being available at our fingertips. It would be George Utley's dream come true!

5) Davey and Goliath: I grew up watching these Lutheran-Church-produced stop-motion shorts on Sunday mornings. I'd like to think that my strong moral fiber comes from the fact that I learned my lessons from this show instead of actually going to church.

This series has a way more tangled home video situation than it should, but if anyone can sort all of it out and get the entire run on an OTT service, it's Walmart. Trinity Broadcasting has been showing the cartoons in recent years, but I don't think there's any official streaming home for the program.  Put it on WalmartView, and you get something for the kids, nostalgia for the adults, and "good values" in one package.